Snuff Out a Thousand Suns
by Damien-Damien
Summary: “Well, Zim,” Dib said with a sneer, “Looks like I finally win.” Slash; weekly updates
1. Arc 1: Chapter 1

**I don't own Invader Zim. This is obvious. If I were Mr. Vasquez, I'd be too busy vomiting out of every orifice on my body from the sheer thought of Zim having a sexual relationship with any of the other characters to be typing this right now.**

**I blame the Alt-IZ-Lurve club at DeviantArt for this. I'd pretty much given up on writing anything since I lost my drive on 'Never', but then they converted to a group and started posting art like crazy. This knocked me into a Zim-binge, causing me to watch all the DVDs in a day followed immediately by watching them with the commentary on, and awoke this old plot bunny from a couple years back. A few people might recognize this; I posted it before on AFF, but it was taken down for some reason I can't recall. Probably disclaimer issues.**

**Upon rereading what I still have of it, I determined it to be a terrible, horrible thing to have been forced upon the Internet. I've reworked the plot some, and am rewriting the whole thing, even if I only had about three chapters done before.**

**Enjoy, you horrible sadistic torture-loving freaks! I will try to update this every Sunday, so if I miss a week, feel free to pelt me with moldy acorns!**

~*~

"Well, Zim," Dib said with a sneer. "Looks like I finally win."

The Irken pushed himself into a sitting position, gingerly touching a cut on his forehead. A glob of thick, purplish blood came away on his finger, and he hissed furiously at Dib. A battle had clearly been fought recently; the streets were full of wreckage and various casualties, both Irken and human. Zim opened his mouth to speak, but a sudden cough wracked his body, spewing more blood onto the ground.

Dib took advantage of the alien's momentary immobility, grabbing him by the wrist and slapping a pair of large, painful-looking handcuffs onto his arms. Grinning triumphantly, Dib pressed a foot against the back of Zim's head, grinding his face on the road. He sighed, rubbing a sleeve against a bleeding spot on his own head, and glanced in the direction of some approaching sirens. Several police cruisers and a media van were speeding towards them, and the teen laughed happily. It was impossible for Zim to get out of this one! His precious Armada had finally arrived earlier that day, leading a full-scale attack on the planet. Dib had been the only one with any knowledge of the aliens' weaknesses, and so had been indispensable during the battle. It had been long and hard, but eventually they had won, and now, now, Zim was finally unmasked, and people would have to realize that Dib had been right all this time! They'd finally see that he wasn't just some big-headed crazy!

The van and one of the cruisers came to a stop next to the two, and Zim was quickly loaded up and taken away. A blonde reporter began interviewing Dib, asking questions about how it felt to finally defeat his life-long nemesis, how long he'd known what Zim was, what his thoughts were about no one ever believing him, and if he had any understanding of just why his head was so large.

"One last question, Dib," the reporter asked, glancing at her watch.

"Ask away," he replied, smiling happily.

The blonde beamed back at the boy. "Why can't you ever stay awake and pay attention during class?"

Dib blinked. "Excuse me?"

The reporter suddenly turned into a massive, balding man in a greasy tank top, and a classroom quickly swam into view. "I shaid, pay attenshun!" he growled, smacking Dib on the back of the head. "Got it?"

The teen sighed, sitting up and wiping a small trail of drool from his cheek. "Yes, Mr. Hansworst," he murmured, propping his chin in his hand.

"Good," the teacher huffed, waddling back to the front of the class. "Now, let'sh get back to our leshon, shall we, clash?"

Dib immediately began ignoring the lecture, looking around the room. It had been nearly six years to the day since Zim had arrived on Earth, and he was still stuck in his class. In fact, Dib hadn't noticed until just this second, but their class hadn't changed at all, right down to where everyone was sitting at. The only difference that came each year was a new room and a new teacher. Weird.

Over the years, Dib had grown from a short, annoying little boy with an overly large head into a fairly tall, slightly less annoying seventeen-year-old. Unfortunately for him, while most of his classmates had become more proportionate over the years, Dib's head was just as big as it had ever been.

Zim had grown as well. He was still far shorter than the other students, just barely brushing five and a half feet, but it was a vast improvement from the year before. He'd still been the elementary-sized creature he'd been on arrival to Earth, until Dib managed to gain a noticeable amount of suspicion to his size. After that, he'd come to skool on stilts for a month, and then had some inexplicable growth spurt over winter break that had left him looking rather sticky and fragile halfway through January.

The sudden ringing of the skool bell snapped Dib out of his thoughts, and he sighed with relief at being released from the building. He packed his things into his book bag, smiling at the memory of Gaz's announcement over breakfast that she would be getting the latest Vampire Piggy Hunter game after skool and then playing the new multi-player mode at a friend's house all night. There was a Mysterious Mysteries marathon tonight, and Dib was excited to be able to actually watch it without listening to Gaz bitch about it being stupid the whole time.

A ten-minute walk had Dib home, and upon going in and turning on the light, he saw a brief flash of movement across the room. He frowned, staring towards where he would've sworn he'd seen a hand. "Gaz? That you? I thought you were going out tonight," he called, dropping his bag onto the floor and starting across the room.

"Ah...yes...yes, it is I; your normal sister! Do not bother coming over here, for I am leaving now to go and do my things for the night!"

Dib rolled his eyes at the incredibly poor impersonation, and casually picked up the lamp from behind the couch. "Well, I was hoping you could help me with something really quick before you left, Gaz. You're good at fixing things, right?"

"No, no; I am far too busy to fix your silly Dib objects. Leave me be, and go upstairs! I have things to do down here and do not wish to be disturbed!"

"I thought you were leaving."

There was a pause for a moment before the intruder continued. "I...I am! I just needed to first...find my remote control! I must have my remote control before leaving the house. It is necessary to my survival to have it! Now leave me be, so I may find it!"

"Oh, come on, Gaz," Dib drawled. "Before you leave, couldn't you just take a look at the lamp for me?!" He dove into the shadowed kitchen that the voice had moved into, swinging wildly until he felt the lamp hit something with a very solid 'thunk'. Smacking the light switch, he saw Zim, clutching his forehead and backing across the room. "C'mere, 'Gaz'! I just want you to fix this for me real quick!"

Zim shrieked, extending his spider legs to pin Dib against the table. The teen squirmed angrily, glaring at the alien hanging above him. "Ah! DIB still thinks he can defeat ME? Lunacy! Why haven't you given up yet, hyuman? It's been nearly six of your years. Why do you still resist me? Why do you still believe you will someday get the best of ZIM? I still live! I still play along with you; using my weakest of plans simply for entertainment! Why, if I wanted to, I could take over your planet while your back was turned for mere seconds! It would be easy for me! You foolish stink-beast, and your smelly head of che-" Zim was interrupted mid-rant by Dib throwing the lamp at him, connecting directly with the wound he'd left before. He blinked in surprise, letting up the pressure on his spider legs for the second Dib needed to throw him off and snatch the lamp back up.

The teen dove on the Irken, slamming the lamp into his forehead several times. There was a rather sickening 'Crack!' after a few more hits, and Zim lay perfectly still on the floor. Dib blinked in surprise, dropping the lamp and standing up. "Oh my God...I...I killed him," he murmured, staring at his fallen enemy. After about a minute, he realized the alien's chest was still moving slightly. Glancing at the previously-crumpled green forehead, Dib was surprised to find it slowly swelling back to its normal position. He watched it for a few seconds before snapping into action. He grabbed Zim by the ankles, and started dragging him down into the basement. Professor Membrane had let Dib convert it into a sort of lab for himself a couple years back, when he'd moved all of his experiments to his extensive labs across town. Something about evil scientists from a few towns over trying to steal his secrets, and they'd be better protected outside the house. Dib had been forced to soundproof the basement after Gaz starting complaining about being able to hear everything he said to himself through the vents, so it'd be a perfect place to keep Zim and do some serious studying on the alien's physiology. He had an autopsy table, complete with powerful arm and leg restraints, set up down there in the hopes that he'd someday be able to get the Irken down there to study, and now each 'thunk' of Zim's head on the stairs filled him with excitement at finally being able to figure out what made the alien tick.

~*~

_Irken Round _2ZZR

_Location: Matternia, The Hatchling Planet_

_ Nursery Block_

_The floor moved like a conveyor belt, bringing new smeets in and taking out those who were ready to move on to Devastis. A particularly small new arrival kept trying to jump onto the portion of the floor taking out the older smeets, but was repelled each time by a rather large Irken guard and his pointy-toed boots._

_Another smeet crossed the room, towering over the would-be escapee by nearly a hafmark. "What are you doing?"_

"_I am trying to get out of here! I don't need any of this coddling; I want to go out and begin training!" the smeet yelled, his voice squeaking in indignation._

_The taller one shook his head, grabbing the other's hand and dragging him across the room. "I just watched you come in last week; you're not ready to get out of here. Didn't you pay any attention to what the Control Brains told you on your way in?" The smaller stared blankly at the older, who sighed, running a hand down the side of his face. "Okay. Listen. We have to stay in here for one round, and then we'll be sent to basic training. We aren't strong enough to handle training yet, and we won't be until we've gotten used to just...existing...y'know?" He frowned, letting go of the smaller Irken. "What's your name, anyway? I'm Shtirk."_

_The other smeet frowned, clearly irritated at the idea of being held in this one building for a full round. "I am Zim," he growled, glaring back at the guard who kept him inside._


	2. Arc 1: Chapter 2

Zim blinked a few times, and started to lift a hand to touch his head. It was throbbing and in horrible pain, which made no sense. His Pak should be dispensing painkillers to stop the ache. After a few seconds, he realized that he couldn't lift his arm, either. He slowly turned his head to see what the problem was while giving minimal irritation to the pounding in his skull, and saw that he was strapped onto a large table. The alien perked his antennae up in confusion, and tilted his eyes up as though to look at the appendages. That was weird. He hadn't taken his disguise off before coming to the Dib's home to steal all his hand towels, so why was he able to move them at all? He blinked again. The wig must have fallen off when Dib...

A surge of memories suddenly hit the Irken, and he hissed in fury. The Dib had attacked him! And it hadn't been anything like their fights in the past; he'd completely overtaken the Invader with pure anger and a lamp! Zim would have to show him that no one could get away with beating in the skull of an Irken. An attempt to release the spider legs in his Pak failed, and Zim realized in horror that he was lying flat on his back. There was nothing pushing his shoulders away from the table's surface. _He wasn't wearing his Pak._

"DIIIIIB!! GIVE ZIM HIS PAK! PUT IT BACK RIGHT NOW, LEST YOU WISH TO BE SHOWN PAIN YOU HAVE NEVER BEFORE KNOWN AND WOULD NEVER WANT TO!" the alien shrieked, writhing on the table. A few drops of water landed on his forehead, and he flinched, hissing.

"Keep it down, Zim. I'm trying to take a look at this," Dib said, sitting a small bucket of water on the floor and turning back to the Pak. "It was a real bitch to get off, and I just managed it."

Zim flattened his antennae against his skull in fury. "That Pak is Irken property, and you have no idea what you are doing with it. Return it to me, or you will suffer."

Dib laughed. "And just how will I suffer, Zim? Hm? Everything you've ever done to me has been with this little thing right here," he waved the Pak back and forth a few times, "and now I've got it." He placed the Pak down on a smaller table he was standing at, and began picking at one of the pink panels. "How d'you open this?"

The Irken shrieked incoherently, jerking at the restraints on his limbs. "Give it to Zim now, Dib!" He began screaming in Irken as the teen wedged a screwdriver into the Pak. "Stop! STOOOOOOP! Give Zim his PAAAAAAAAAAAAAK!"

"Mmm....no," Dib said, grinning as both panels popped up. "Ooh, they operate on the same mechanism to open, huh? What's in here..." He started pulling various equipment out, setting aside what wasn't attached and taking a pair of wire clippers to whatever was. Zim continued screaming for almost a full eight minutes while Dib emptied the Pak, and the teen only turned to look at him again when there was nothing left in the machine except some kind of battery-looking thing he couldn't get out. "Okay, Zim; you want this so badly? Here ya go," he said, tossing it onto the table next to the alien. "Have fun putting it back on."

Zim had gone quite pale by this point, and seemed to be sweating. He quieted when the Pak landed by his side, and began wriggling. Panting, he managed to get a hip on top of the device, and started slowly squirming it towards his shoulder blades. By the time he managed to get it back into place, his eyes had gone rather unfocused and his breathing had grown even more labored. It clicked back into place, and Zim closed his eyes, relief flooding his face. His skin quickly regained its bright, normal color, and his breathing calmed. After a few seconds, the alien opened his eyes just a sliver to glare at Dib. "Never remove an Irken's Pak, Dib," he growled. "I will make you pay for that one."

Dib made a little noise of interest at the Irken's reaction to his Pak being taken, and gave a lopsided grin. "Interesting, Zim. You didn't look too good for a minute there. Does that thing have some kind of life support system in it?" he asked. Zim stiffened, flattening his antennae again, and Dib chuckled at the reaction. "I'll take that as a yes. Don't worry, I'll leave it alone. It's pretty useless as far as weapons go now, and I'd much rather have a live study subject."

Zim growled as Dib grasped his left glove by one finger, slowly pulling it out from under the strap keeping his arm immobile. As it came off, Zim curled his fingers into a fist in an attempt to keep it for himself. Dib sighed. "Zim, we can do this the easy way, or the fun way. Which would you prefer?" The alien's only response was to spit at the boy's face. The warm, clear glob landed directly between Dib's eyes. He pursed his lips, letting go of Zim's glove, and wiped the spit off, rubbing it from his fingers on the alien's shirt. "Okay then. Fun it is."

Dib crossed the room, picking his little bucket of water back up. "Hope you remembered your glue today, Zim," he said happily, hooking the bucket up to an overly-elaborate harness above Zim's head, where a small dribble of liquid began leaking slowly onto the alien's forehead. Zim wriggled in discomfort, but refused to give the human the pleasure of hearing him scream. When Dib continued trying to take his glove, Zim made a fist again. Dib sighed in annoyance, reached up, and tipped the bucket so a sudden splash fell onto the Irken. Zim gave a shriek of surprise, and Dib yanked the glove the rest of the way off. As Dib started to feel the now-bare alien flesh, Zim flexed and fought against the prodding fingers, mumbling various Irken death threats.

Dib frowned at the alien, barely touching the tip of a green claw. "Okay, Zim. Y'know what? I think I have something that can make this a lot easier, but still nice and fun. Don't run off, now." He turned away, digging through a cabinet for a few seconds, and then sat a syringe and a small bottle on the table next to Zim's weapons. After filling the needle with whatever was in the bottle, he came back to the autopsy table, straddling Zim's hips and pulling his shirt up a little. The Irken started bucking and writhing like crazy at this, but Dib laid himself out on top of Zim's body, holding his head completely still, and injected the needle in a large vein on the side of his throat. "Theeeere we go," he murmured as the plunger forced the contents of the syringe into the alien bloodstream, carefully removing it after it was empty and hopping off of the table.

"What was that?! What have you done to ZIM you pork-smelly?! I will have your head as a TROPHY on my wall when I get out of here!" Zim shrieked, fighting his bonds even more than he had before.

"It's just a little something to help me out, Zim," Dib said with a little smile. "It shouldn't hurt you." He typed a few commands into a laptop sitting on the far side of Zim's weapons, and the alien realized with horror that he was quickly losing all feeling in his left arm. "They're something my dad made to use as painkillers for really sickly people who get a lot of surgeries. A kind of nanobot, that will never leave your system once injected, and can remove all feeling from any body part with a single command. Let's move on now, shall we?" he asked, unstrapping the lifeless limb and lifting it up.

He prodded gently at the tip of the claw he'd abandoned, making a noise of surprise. "It's not sharp at all," he murmured, pressing on it. "It just bends right down when you press it. Guess they're just so pointy for show; maybe kinda like a moth's eye spots?" He pulled a small black notebook out of a pocket, jotting down his thoughts as he went. A pair of scissors were pulled from a drawer, and cut down through Zim's shirt sleeve. "His skin's really cool to the touch, too; but other than a slight give, it's pretty tough. Almost like an exoskeleton. I wonder..." Dib dropped the arm onto the table, going back to his laptop. A few seconds later, Zim lost all sensation from the neck down. "Don't worry, Zim. The nanobots should keep your...what was it you called it? Your squeedlyspooch? Anyway, they should keep that working for you."

He picked his scissors up again, cutting down the front of the Irken's shirt and pulling the flaps to either side of his body. "Oh, wow," he breathed, running a finger down a long line that ran the length of the alien's torso. About five other lines ran from horizontally across his chest and stomach, stopping at what looked like identical spots on each side. Dib quickly grabbed up his notebook again, penciling out a quick sketch of what the alien's body looked like so far. When that was completed, he gently pushed at each of the places the lines overlapped. They had a bit more give than the rest of Zim's skin. "Maybe he molts to grow..." Dib thought about that for a moment. An explanation like that actually made a lot of sense. It explained why Zim had only that single, rapid period of growth, and why he'd looked so...ucky afterwards. "I wonder if I could induce a molt." Zim shrieked again in response to that thought, whipping his head from side to side. "Calm down, Zim. I'm sure it won't hurt that badly, will it? With the nanobots in place, you won't feel a thing. I want to study you; you don't want me to touch you. If you molt, I can study your shed skin, and leave you alone for a while. Okay?" Dib reached around to undo the three remaining restraints, and began cutting the rest of the Irken's clothes off. Zim hissed in various alien languages as the boy worked, trying to move anything he could, but the nanobots seemed to be doing their job perfectly.

Dib paused after the removal of the green boy's pants, looking curiously between his legs. There was nothing there except a faint, x-shaped mark with a small anus-like hole behind it. He made a mental note to try and figure out how Zim's species bred later. It'd be a definite benefit if his Armada ever showed up. If the humans could hold out long enough, they'd be able to sabotage whatever reproductive systems they had and hopefully outlast the remaining population.

Moving up Zim's naked body, Dib pressed his fingers into the depression made by the middle line on his stomach and the vertical one. Slowly, he added pressure, feeling the skin starting to separate just slightly. Zim screamed something more in Irken as the separation began to grow at more pressure from Dib's fingers, and when a one finger suddenly broke through, the alien went absolutely nuts shrieking at him. The human removed his finger, looking at the small, circular hole. With Zim's screams in another language, Dib honestly didn't know if the nanobots were unable to repress all the pain that he seemed to be causing, but it seemed like they probably weren't. Ah well, Dib thought to himself. May as well get it over with quickly, then.

He wiped a bit of bluish, see-through goo that had come out of the small cavity in Zim's skin on his finger off on his pants, and dug through a drawer of lab tools, pulling out a scalpel and a small knife. After using the knife to make the hole a bit bigger, he slid the scalpel in and ran it down the length of the line. As he cut, the horizontal lines cracked open, peeling away from the alien on their own, and after less than ten minutes, they were open all the way, in each direction, and Dib was able to reach in and start pulling Zim's limp, sticky body out of the now-useless shell. It took a bit of squeezing to maneuver the Irken's head through the space left by his neck, but Dib managed it with only minimal damage done to the shed skin. Zim's Pak came out still completely attached, leaving a large, oval hole in the exoskeleton, which Dib slid out from under the pruny green flesh that was now exposed and covered in that same blue gunk, before dropping the surprisingly light body back onto the table and reattaching the restraints. He carried the skin over to the other table, lying it on the other side of Zim's weapons. "Now, I would leave the nanobots active, but Dad said one of his test subjects died from having them on for too long. We wouldn't want that to happen, now, would we?" he asked with a little smirk, typing away at his laptop.

Zim regained the feeling in his entire body all at once, and there was a sharp, shooting pain coming from every single inch of it. It was worse where the table and straps were touching it, but even what was just exposed to the air felt like it was on fire. The Irken began shrieking in agony, trying to hold himself still but unable to fight the instinctual need to escape the cause of his pain. This, of course, simply made it worse, which resulted in him jerking even more. Dib just plugged a pair of earbuds into his laptop, turned on some Internet radio station, and began carefully wiping the blue ooze from the skin and into an empty bucket.

~*~

_Irken Round 2ZZR_

_Location: Matternia, The Hatchling Planet_

_ Educational Block_

"_Zim, what did you do this time?"_

_The smeet glared angrily from the grip of a guard. "Skoodge and I were simply trying to do some exploring. We wanted to see the planet's surface."_

_Shtirk laughed. "More like you did, and you just dragged Skoodge along with you. Speaking of that, where is he?"_

"_He got stuck in an escape hatch. They're trying to get him loose right now."_

_The guard shook Zim angrily. "You're lucky he didn't wipe out half the planet, smeet! He was only a mark away from the power supply to the learning capsule!" Shtirk snorted a bit, trying to muffle his laughter, and the guard turned to glare at him. "This is no laughing matter! There could have been very serious consequences for your friend's actions!"_

_Another smeet came over, looking rather nervous. "What's going on, Shtirk? Are you in trouble?"_

"_Nah. Just Zim," he replied, clearly bored by the small Irken. "C'mon, Flurn. Let's go get some nachos."_

"_All right," Flurn said, tearing his large pink eyes from the direction the guard had gone, carrying the undersized smeet._

_~*~_

**I don't own Invader Zim. This is obvious. If I were Mr. Vasquez, I'd be too busy vomiting out of every orifice on my body from the sheer thought of Zim having a sexual relationship with any of the other characters to be typing this right now.**

**Yay torture! Sadistic!analytical!Dib is being really fun to write. I'm gonna be sad when this bit's over; although then we'll be getting into real fun. And I got a horribly detail-starved outline typed up for this, so I know where I'm going, but have plenty of space to flesh things out and keep from getting bored. Huzzah! Review for me, and tell me what you thought of Dib and his nanobots of evil, please! I'll give you all Suck Monkeys! *holds out Monkeys***


	3. Arc 1: Chapter 3

"Zim? Zim. Hey, wake up, hm?"

The Irken grunted, blinking his eyes open at the sound of a soft voice. Dib stared down at him, and Zim hissed angrily. "What do you want now, filth-monkey?" He'd been the human's prisoner for nearly three days now, and he'd been occupied enough with running various tests on the underdeveloped exoskeleton he'd taken the first day. It had been torture for Zim to be held so tightly on the table after that, and if it had been just a couple weeks later, it probably would have finished hardening after his molt the winter before, and held up much better against Dib; not to mention the fact that the skin below would have been more prepared to touch the outside world.

"I've got a present for you. You've seemed hungry the past couple days, so open wide." The teen held a large forkful of something steamy up to the Irken's mouth.

Zim sniffed at it for a moment, eyes narrowed in suspicion. "This is a Vort dog," he murmured. "Where did you get it?"

Dib smirked, holding up a small tape player and pressing one of the buttons. "Funny," he said over a scream of 'I am ZIM!', "how easy it is to fool voice-recognition software these days, isn't it? I got them from your fridge. Now open up, and eat. I don't want you starving to death."

The alien clenched his jaw shut angrily.

"Not hungry?" Dib asked with a frown. Zim shook his head firmly, but was quickly betrayed by a grumbling sound from his squeedlyspooch. Dib grinned, placing the fork down on a plate full of the dogs, and pulled his little notebook out again. "You don't show hunger easily, but that sounded a lot like a human's stomach growling. Fascinating," he mumbled, scribbling away in the book. "You sure you don't want any, Zim? They don't smell half bad."

Zim stared silently at the ceiling, ignoring the questioning from the human and the burn that still plagued him from touching the table. How dare the human sneak into his home! Even if it was to get something he could eat, it was still unforgivable. And where had GIR been when the Dib broke in? Probably napping or making waffles, if he hadn't been running around town with that filthy pig friend of his.

Dib shrugged, moving the plate to the little table. "Guess we get to do this on an empty stomach, then. Not my problem," he said, lifting his scalpel and a small metal tray. "I think I've gotten whatever information I can out of that exoskeleton, so let's get down to business."

The alien squirmed a bit as Dib reached down with the scalpel towards his cheek. "You've already studied Zim's skin! What do you hope to accomplish with that?!"

"I've been looking at your old skin," Dib replied, peeling a small bit of flesh from the alien's face. "I want to see how the structure differs from what you grew underneath that." He gave a surprised look to the wound. Instead of the blue goo that had been under Zim's outer skin, a reddish-purple liquid slowly ran out. Dib quickly grabbed a few microscope slides, catching some of the alien blood. "I'm just going to take some samples from you, then I'll leave you be again, okay?" he assured the alien, reactivating the nanobots. Zim growled as he lost feeling everywhere but his head once more, glaring at the human. Dib lifted a syringe, drawing some more blood from his arm, then took his scalpel to the base of one of his fingers, cutting it clean off. He quickly placed a gauze pad against the wound, taping it into place. "I think that's enough for the moment, Zim," he said, turning the nanobots off again. The Irken hissed in pain as he felt the loss of his finger, trying once more to escape his restraints.

Dib went back to ignoring the alien, and instead turned his attention to the finger. He carefully peeled away the flesh and muscle tissue, so he could get a look at the bone structure. It was surprisingly similar to a human's index finger, only a good inch longer.

The door to the basement suddenly opened, and Gaz's voice carried down. "Dib! Get your ass up here before you miss the bus!"

"Just a sec!" Dib called back as the door slammed closed again. "Sorry to do this with no painkillers for you, but I don't know what would happen if I numb your head, Zim," the human said, hurriedly walking back to the Irken with his scalpel.

"My head? What are you doing, hyuman? Wha-ngyaaAAAAAAAAAAA!!" Zim shrieked as Dib cut into his right antennae at the base. There was a quiet crunching noise, and the appendage pulled away from his skull.

As soon as the antennae was loose, Dib crossed the room, setting it in some kind of plastic box, and closed the top of it. He typed some commands into a desktop computer sitting next to it, and a bit of light slipped out from the crack where it closed at. "Gotta go, Zim. See ya later!" he called, jogging up the stairs. Zim just laid completely still, fighting the urge to vomit from the painful throbbing in his head.

~-~-~

"What were you doing down there?" Gaz asked while Dib grabbed his book bag. "You've barely come out for three days. It's been pretty cool."

"Oh, just studying. I got something of Zim's that's keeping me busy." He shrugged his bag onto one shoulder, glancing at Gaz trying to close her bulging black messenger bag. "Got enough stuff?"

"I'm staying over at Tess's again tonight. She found a secret level in Vampire Piggy Hunter." Gaz growled, kicking the bag. "Close, you stupid bitch!" Dib cocked an eyebrow at a pair of tiny, see-through, lacey purple panties that fell out, plopping down onto the floor. "What?" she snapped, stuffing the underwear back into place and forcing the bag shut.

"Ah, nothing," Dib said rather awkwardly, opening the door and stepping out onto the sidewalk. "Just...wondering why you would need those to visit a friend, is all."

"You have a problem with a girl trying to get laid, Dib?" Gaz asked irritably, shoving past him towards the bus.

"I thought you were going to Tess's!" Dib said, feeling a bit sick at the thought of his sister being....intimate.

"I am."

Dib stopped at that, trying and failing to process what she'd just said. "But...I thought you were dating Torque Smacky."

"No, I was fucking him. There's a difference. Dating is just stupid, and if you ever claim that I'm anyone's girlfriend again, I will tear out your spleen and feed it to the neighbor's dog."

Dib blinked a few times, trying to think of anything more to say, and ultimately decided on just shaking his head and climbing onto the bus.

~-~-~

Several streets over from Dib's house, a little green dog walked out of its house. GIR glanced around the yard, wondering where Zim was. It wasn't like Master to be gone for so long! The robot knew there was something he'd been told to do if Zim was ever gone for more than two days, but couldn't quite remember what it was. The Tallest? It had something to do with the Tallest.

GIR was suddenly snapped out of his wondering about Zim by a ringing bell. A man wearing a burrito on his head was walking slowly down the street, pushing a cart and screaming. "Tacoooooos! Get yer tacooooooooooos! They're beefy and deliciouuuuuuus! You'll only get a liiiittle diarrhea from 'em! TACOOOOOOS!!"

"TACO-MAN!!" GIR screeched, launching himself at the vehicle.

~-~-~

The next several days went by as a blur to Zim. Dib would cut away various bits of him and study them; gloat to the alien how he'd finally beaten him; test his reactions to various substances and environments; and anything else he thought of. He'd nearly killed the Irken when he turned off all the heating in the basement, and turning on the air conditioning. He had realized that the blue liquid held between the layers of Zim's skins had similar properties to antifreeze, and had decided to test if that's what it basically was. The human had been quite right about that, and almost lost his test subject that day.

Dib also seemed to be getting an absolute kick out of testing what he was learning simply by asking the alien if he was right and watching his reaction. Using this method, he'd managed to determine that Zim's antennae acted as auditory devices and were used for balance; that his Pak could normally regenerate most body parts, but he had removed the part that controlled any growth; and that the Irkens' social hierarchy was based entirely on height. The last bit he'd had an idea of, but hadn't realized there was nothing else considered.

After a week, Dib finally seemed to lose some interest in the alien. He'd studied everything he could think of, except Zim's reproductive system; but he was finding himself quite unable to learn anything about it. The Irken just didn't seem to have anything at all down there. Even the 'X' mark had disappeared after molting. The human sighed, looking at the pale green alien. After the initial excitement over being able to beat and study and humiliate Zim, he had to admit that he was getting rather bored. The chase was over; there was no more challenge; and the boy hated coming to terms with the idea that Zim had brought so much enjoyment to his life. He sighed again, deciding to leave the alien alone for the night. He'd go watch some Mysterious Mysteries, and maybe come morning, he would be able to focus on Zim again.

~*~

_Irken Round 5ZZR_

_Location: Devastis, The Training Planet_

_Southern Half, Basic Training Block, Food Court_

"_So then, Tenn said that she was 'perfectly capable of getting past the mess herself', and when she was walking away, she slipped in the goo, slammed into Skoodge, and knocked over a table full of beakers!" Zim exclaimed, biting into a large sandwich._

_Flurn spat out a mouthful of nachos out onto the table, laughing and ignoring a glare thrown at the two by the table next to them. It was always good to hear about bad things happening to bitchy women. He elbowed Shtirk, who had simply smirked and gone back to his milkshake. "C'mon, Shtirk! That was funny; laugh!"_

_The older Irken rolled his eyes at the elbowing and continuing drinking his shake. "Yeah, yeah," he muttered with a grin. "Gimme some of those."_

"_Hey!" Flurn whined as a handful of his nachos were kidnapped and devoured rather messily. In retaliation, he reached across the table and stole some of Zim's fries. This resulted in a brief, three-way food snatching battle, ending when a bracelet on Shtirk's wrist starting beeping._

"_Ah, crap; I'm gonna be late!" he groaned, standing up from the table. "Hate to leave you two alone, but I gotta go. See ya later, guys!" He picked up the remains of his lunch, dropped it in a trash can, and took off to class._

_Zim and Flurn were quiet for a few moments after Shtirk left. After a couple of minutes, the taller of the two felt a foot rubbing gently against his leg, and glanced up. "Zim?"_

"_Hm?"_

"_Are you...touching my leg?"_

"_Perhaps," the younger Invader-in-training said, sipping at Shtirk's pilfered milkshake._

"_You're flirting with me again, aren't you?" Flurn asked, blushing slightly._

_Zim smirked, lowering his foot to rest gently on top of the other's. "Flirting is a very common practice among other life forms. Nothing to get so embarrassed about, Flurn. Most people would simply return the favor..? I can teach you, if you don't know how..."_

_Flurn blushed harder as he slipped his foot out from under Zim's, and trailed it up the other's leg._

"_There we go," Zim murmured, reaching across the table to place his fingers over Flurn's. A snicker from the next table over caught his attention momentarily, and he frowned before whispering, "Why don't we take this somewhere more private? Neither of us have any more classes today, and Shtirk shouldn't be back to your guys' room until tonight."_

_~*~_

**I don't own Invader Zim. This is obvious. If I were Mr. Vasquez, I'd be too busy vomiting out of every orifice on my body from the sheer thought of Zim having a sexual relationship with any of the other characters to be typing this right now.**

**And Zim's got a boyfriend all those years ago, haha! Please review! I'm lazy and don't feel like typing out a proper author's note.**

**I want spaghetti.**


	4. Arc 1: Chapter 4

Gaz glanced up from her game as Dib emerged from the basement, plopping down on the couch. He sighed, turning on the TV. "What's your problem?" Gaz growled as Mysterious Mysteries started playing.

"Hm?" Dib looked at his sister, surprised that she seemed to be showing a bit of interest in him. "Oh, it's nothing. Just ran out of things to study for now." He gave a short laugh, and stretched. "It's funny. This...particular thing of Zim's that I got, I didn't think would ever run out of things to learn about. But I guess for now, I just need a break."

"I stopped listening to you at 'nothing', Dib. Shut up," Gaz said, mashing buttons in an attempt to kill Count Ultra Mega Pigula. A few minutes later, a small television screen flew into the room.

"Son, daughter! Time for bed. You must rest your minds if you are to do well in school! Don't forget to brush your teeth," the recording said, staying just long enough to watch Dib turn off the TV and start towards the stairs before it flew off again.

"C'mon, Gaz. We've got school tomorrow."

"Dib, if you know what's good for you, you will shut up and let me finish this level. I'll go to bed in a little bit," Gaz hissed. Pigula had entered his last transformation, and Gaz could almost taste victory.

A few short minutes later, Pigula vomited a massive wave of acid across the entire screen, and Gaz stared in horror as Game Over flashed mockingly at her. She growled, turning the game off and tossing it onto the coffee table, and started towards the stairs. About halfway there, she stopped, glancing back towards the basement door. She had to admit, she was the tiniest bit curious as to just what was down there. Whatever it was, it had to be vital to Zim leaving his house. He hadn't been to skool in a week, and he hadn't been over to try and steal it back;at least not as far as Gaz knew. After a few more seconds of thought, she shrugged, mumbled "What the hell," and started for the basement.

After opening the door, she sniffed. It smelled kind of funky down here. Kinda like raw meat. She felt her way down the stairs, cursing whoever'd built this house with the light switch at the bottom of the stairs along the way. When she finally reached the floor, she flipped on the light, blinking and glancing around the room. Whatever Dib had was probably somewhere around that table he'd spent half the day dragging downstairs last summer.

Gaz blinked in surprise when she focused her attention on said table, and saw the green body lying on it. She crossed the room quietly, stopping next to the alien. "Dib finally beat ya, huh?"

The Irken's eyes flickered open, slowly focusing on the girl. "...The Dib's...sister..," he murmured, closing his eyes again for a few seconds. "What do you want...with Zim?"

The girl quirked an eyebrow as she realized Zim wasn't dead, as she'd thought at first. "Just having a look around." Glancing at Dib's table, she saw the finger, antennae and skin he'd removed, all lying next to the notebook he'd written in. She flipped through the book for a few seconds before getting bored, and turning back to the alien. "So, he's been doing all this shit to you with you alive? God, Dib is such a douche," she growled, flicking the antennae to the floor. "You may be an annoying little fuck, Zim, but even I would've killed you before cutting you apart."

Zim forced his eyes open again, forcing himself to focus on Gaz again. "The Gaz really does not like her brother...do you?" Gaz laughed quietly, nodding. Zim was quiet for a moment, clearly fighting with what he was about to say, but finally murmured quietly, "Contact GIR for me. I need him to call my leaders...so they can help me." The Irken turned his face away, refusing to make eye contact after asking for help. "If you do this...I can make sure you are brought off the planet before the Armada destroys it. You like video games, yes?" The girl nodded. "I can take you to the Miyamotian planet. They make the best games this side of Irk."

Gaz nodded. "I think I can do that for ya. But you'd better remember to take me with you."

"Of course," Zim murmured, closing his eyes again. Gaz loosened the straps on his limbs a little before turning and heading up to bed.

~-~-~

The next morning, Gaz told Dib she was going to walk to skool instead of taking the bus, and went looking for GIR. She didn't have anything important going on that day, anyway. Just her stupid book report, and she hadn't even read past chapter one for that.

It wasn't too long before Gaz reached Zim's house. A cart was upturned on the lawn, surrounded by beans and melted cheese. Gaz carefully stepped around it, and was about to open the door to the house when it smacked open, hitting her in the face. GIR came padding out, fully dressed in his dog suit, and with a black leash dangling from his neck. He walked over to the cart, scooped up a handful of beans, and started down the street, licking the food from his hand. Gaz closed the door, scowling, and followed the robot.

"Hey."

GIR stopped, and turned to look at Gaz, sucking contentedly at his beans. "You seen my master?" he asked after a minute, dropping his now-clean hand to his side.

"I have, actually," Gaz replied, picking up the end of GIR's leash. "He told me to find you for him."

The robot squealed happily. "Master been gone a long time! Where izee?"

"Why don't you help me get a call through to you and Zim's leaders, and I'll tell you guys all about it?"

GIR snapped a quick salute, then took off running back into the house, dragging Gaz through the air behind him.

~-~-~

"We haven't heard from Zim in a while, have we?"

The red-eyed Irken glanced up curiously at his purple partner. "Not since he molted. Why?"

The other shrugged, scratching the back of his head. "It's just kinda weird. He usually calls every couple tenhafs."

"True. Do you have to bring him up in the bedroom, though?" the red male asked, nuzzling at the junction of the purple one's neck and shoulder. A knock on the door brought his attention away from his lover for a moment, and when it was repeated a minute later, the red Tallest pulled himself out of bed and into a silky red robe. He opened the door, frowning at the drone on the other side. "Can I help you?"

The drone blushed a bit at the sight of his Tallest in his private chambers, but he cleared his throat and got over it quickly. "There's a transmission coming in from Earth. We've put them on hold for the moment, but thought we should inform you of it."

"Speak of a Vortian," the scarlet-eyed Irken muttered. "We told you not to disturb us for a few hours, drone. Just because Zim's fallen behind in keeping us updated on his progress doesn't mean you should disobey orders just to put him through. We'll call him back later."

"Ah!" The drone stuck a foot in, stopping the Tallest from closing the door. The taller Irken glared at the drone, shoving the door to crush his foot a bit. "B-but...it's not Zim, M-my Tallest." The other paused, reopening the door. The purple-eyed male stood up from the bed, picking up his robes and slipping into the bathroom to dress. "The transmission is coming from his base, and his SIR unit, but Zim isn't there. One of those hoomuns he's trying to take over is there, instead."

"Really," the Tallest said, cocking an eye ridge. "All right; we'll be out in a few minutes. Have some drinks or nachos or something ready for us when we get there."

"Yes, My Tallest!" the drone said, scuttling back towards the Massive's transmission room.

~-~-~

Gaz sighed, watching GIR dance happily to the music that had been playing for nearly ten minutes. If these Irkens were so damn advanced, why hadn't they been able to find something better to play when they put callers on hold?! Suddenly, the music stopped, and the screen changed from some weird triangle-symbol to show two Irkens with really big heads staring at her. "Finally," Gaz growled, sitting up straighter. "What took you guys so long?"

The purple-eyed one frowned. "Who are you?"

"I asked first."

"So? We're the leaders of the rulers of the universe. You're just some little...girl...thing!"

Gaz opened her mouth to spit an insult back at the stupid thing, when the red-eyed one butted in. "Okay, come on; break it up, smeets." The other glared in response to being called a smeet, whatever the hell that was. "You're calling us from Zim's base." Gaz nodded. "But you're clearly not Zim." She nodded again. "Soooo....what d'ya want?"

"My brother caught Zim, and has been torturing him in our basement for about a week. He asked me to call you guys for him, and said he'd take me off the planet with him if I could get you to come rescue him."

The red one frowned. "Your species is good enough to catch an Invader? Even if it is one as bad as Zim, that...that shouldn't be possible." He pressed his antennae against his head, thinking. "Maybe we should blow Earth up just in case," he murmured to the purple one.

His companion nodded. "We don't want her...brother? What's a brother?" He shook his head. "Eh, not important. We don't want this 'brother' to train the rest of the planet to attack us. Zim said they're tall when they mature. They might be able to become a threat."

The other nodded as well, motioning to a drone. "Send a few ships to Earth and blow it up, would ya?"

Gaz blinked in surprise. "Aren't you gonna send a ship for me and Zim first?"

The red-eyed Irken frowned. "Weeeeell, I just don't see how that's very practical. Zim's cost us a lot in the past, and you're a human. I don't see what the point would be."

"Hang on a second," the other said. "We're just gonna blow it up? Zim said they make pretty good snacks, once you can get past the horrible digestive problems. We could go down, get Zim, her, and some of the really weak and stupid humans, and put them to work on Foodcourtia."

"We've got plenty of good workers there already. And besides, Zim's not going to do us any good. He's defective; it doesn't matter what happens to him. We were trying to get rid of him in the first place!"

"I know, but we've put almost a round into studying this planet. He's got to have a good chunk of knowledge we can get from his Pak, and letting him blow up like some lower life form would destroy any chance of getting that knowledge," the purple one snapped.

The other narrowed his eyes a bit at the hostility his partner was showing, and motioned to the drone again. "Okay, you two win. I kinda want to see this planet up close anyway. Drone, get some more ships ready for backup, and we'll go. It should be about...two weeks? I think so. Let's go with that, human. About two of your weeks, and we should be there. This baby's got a good engine on her," he said, proudly patting one of the ship's walls. "How far from Zim's base is your 'basement'?"

"Three streets over. We're the house with the electrical fields out front, and one of your ships in the backyard," Gaz replied, shoving at the robot who'd suddenly decided he wanted a hug.

The purple-eyed Irken blinked in surprise. "Our ships? Why do you have one of our ships?"

"Dib got it from that Tak chick. He practically broke it trying to get it working again, though. I swear, he sucks at mechanical stuff."

"Does it work, though?" the red one asked curiously.

"Yeah. I got it up and running so I could kick Dib's ass when I found out he broke my vampire doll and blamed it on a dog."

"Huh." The Tallest glanced at each other for a moment, before the red one spoke again. "We could probably set you up as a technician. You've gotta be pretty good if you could fix Irken equipment."

"For a human," the purple one added.

"Yeah. Good for a human," the other agreed, nodding. "See you in a while, then."

Gaz nodded, watching the purple Irken pulling the red one off screen before turning off her end and kicking GIR in the head. "Quit hugging me. Come over to my place when your leaders arrive, so I know to leave. Okay?"

GIR's eyes flashed red, and he nodded firmly. "Yes sir!"

"Alright then. I'm going to the arcade. See ya in a couple weeks."

~*~

_Irken Round 7ZZR_

_Location: Planet Vort_

_Scientist Dormitories_

"_So, Zim; when am I going to meet this Flurn? He sounds like quite the charmer."_

_Zim smirked. "Oh he is, Fleem. He said he would be visiting later today. I've nearly finished my energy absorbing creature for Tallest Miyuki's visit next tenhaf, so he'll be coming over to help fill my...free time." The scientist's smirk grew a bit wider at that comment, and Fleem giggled, smacking his shoulder._

"_Such a pervert!" she exclaimed, grinning. "What about your other friend? Shtirk? You said he was a looker, too. I want to meet him."_

"_Eh, Zim isn't quite sure if he'll come along," the male said, his smile twisting into a half-frown. "He hasn't seemed too keen on Flurn and I being mates. Says it's a waste of time, if we want to be Invaders."_

_Fleem gave a slight nod, flopping back in the squishy chair she'd claimed upon her first visit to Zim's room. "I guess that's true. But really, he should be enjoying his youth. Get some action while he still can!"_

_Zim perked up at a knock on the door, and he hopped off the bed, crossing the room in a few quick strides. "Well, if he's come, you should tell him yourself. Maybe you two'll hit it off." Opening the door revealed a single, tall Irken, smiling and holding a small bag of polished rocks. Zim grinned happily as the bag was handed over, and he sifted through them a bit. Anything shiny and organic was rather hard to get a hold of, and seen as a fairly romantic gesture to be given. Zim leaned up on his toes to rub his antennae against Flurn's cheek in thanks, and pulled him into the room._

"_Flurn, this is Fleem. She is Zim's supervisor. Fleem, meet Flurn," Zim said proudly, making himself comfortable in his lover's lap on his bed._

_Fleem smiled, looking the newcomer over a couple times. "He is a nice catch, Zim. You're a lucky Irken. Pretty tall for your age, too. I wouldn't be surprised to be reporting to a Tallest Flurn in the future," she said, placing her head in a hand. Zim narrowed his eyes a bit at the mild flirting, and Fleem chuckled. "Oh, don't worry, Zim. I'm not gonna steal him away from you. I'll let you boys have some privacy, kay? See you around," the female breathed, rising from her chair and leaving the room, flipping the light off on her way out._

_~*~_

**I don't own Invader Zim. This is obvious. If I were Mr. Vasquez, I'd be too busy vomiting out of every orifice on my body from the sheer thought of Zim having a sexual relationship with any of the other characters to be typing this right now.**

**And here's chapter four! This was gonna continue through the next chapter, but it started getting really long. About eight and a half pages, I think. Although...this is over six, now...hm....ah well! I didn't want to spoil you guys, so I split it in two, and wrote an extra bit about Zim and Flurn's history. Lucky you! Review, my zombie slaves!**

**Before I go, I must inform you that I now have a website! I sell fleece hats and plushies and such! They're cheap, and I'm having a sale today since it's the first day! Go buy stuff!**

**damienscloset. webs. com**


	5. Arc 1: Chapter 5

Almost two weeks after Gaz had been to Zim's house, Dib had discovered, completely on accident, that the Irken was incredibly ticklish in a few spots throughout his body. He was absolutely uncontrollably ticklish! Dib had managed to keep the alien squirming and screaming for nearly half an hour with a single spot he'd found by his ankle before getting bored with that, and moving on to figure out what all Earth substances the Invader was allergic to. Surprisingly, even though the alien was hurt so easily by things like meat and water, Dib found that he could hold a lighter against Zim's flesh for ten minutes with no serious damage. He'd tried to pull out one of the alien's teeth to study, as well, and discovered that all the Irken's teeth were attached to each other. Removing one had pulled them all out, along with quite a bit of his gooey blood, and for whatever reason, the teeth had been slowly growing back, even though none of Zim's other parts were following suit.

Dib was currently taking a break from studying Zim, though; and was relaxing on the couch, thumbing through a magazine, and Gaz kept looking up from her game to peer out the window. "What're you looking for?" he asked, after about the twentieth time she'd looked out in the past three minutes.

"The mailman," Gaz deadpanned, turning back to her game again.

"Right," Dib said, cocking an eyebrow and returning to his magazine. "You do realize the mailman comes at the same time every day. He was here at noon; if you're waiting on something, it's not gonna arrive today."

Gaz smirked, looking out the window again. "Not that mailman, Dib. This one," she said, flicking her game off, picking her messenger bag off the floor, and starting towards the door. "I'd say it's been nice knowing you, but it really hasn't."

"What?" Dib frowned, peering out the window. Heading up the walk was what appeared to be GIR in one of the worst mailman costumes Dib had ever seen in his life. "Been wondering if he was ever gonna show up," he muttered, following Gaz out of the house. "What's going on?" he asked as she handed her bag to the little robot.

Gaz smirked, eyes flickering up at the sky. "I wouldn't know. You're the alien expert here, so why don't you explain it?"

Dib slowly looked up at the sky, and was quickly filled with a mounting horror. A gigantic pink ship filled half the sky above his house, and the rest of the sky was hidden behind smaller ships, varying from pinks to purples. "Holy shit," he whimpered. This must have been that Armada Zim had always talked about. Somehow...he hadn't expected it to be quite so big. As he watched, a small purple ship popped out of the giant ship, and started flying down towards the ground, followed by a medium-sized white ship, and another similar purple one. Dib stood frozen as they landed, and several Irken emerged. Two fairly short ones hopped out of the white ship, a single one about Gaz's height stepped out of one of the purples ones, and what Dib recognized as one of the Irkens' fucking leaders climbed out of the last one! He was dressed a little differently, with more armor than Dib had seen him in before when he would hack into Zim's communications, but there was no mistaking the unique body shape and seven-foot height for anything other than one of the Tallest.

The tall one glanced at Gaz and GIR, nodding to them, and they climbed into the other Irken's purple ship. Then he turned to Dib, eyes narrowing into furious slits. He swiftly crossed the distance between them, grabbing the human by his hair, and pulled him up to close the few inches' difference in their heights. "Where is he?" he hissed, giving the teen a shake.

Dib glared at the alien. "I don't have to tell you anything," he growled back. "Why do you even care? He's been on Earth for six years, and he never made any progress! He's a horrible Invader."

The Irken frowned, wrapping his other hand around Dib's throat. "You sound just like Shtirk. 'Oh, he's defective; why should we bother saving him'?" He slammed the boy against his house, tightening the grip on his neck. "It doesn't matter how good of an Invader he is, or how smart he is, or even how tall he is. What matters is that he is an Irken; and the only ones we allow to harm an Irken is another Irken. Now." A metal leg, similar to Zim's own but much longer, extended from his Pak, flipped Dib's glasses onto the ground, and buried its tip in his left eye. "Where. Is. Zim?"

Dib screamed, kicking at the alien as blood poured down his face. A rather sickening 'pop' was heard, and Dib realized in disgust that his eye had just been completely removed. "I'm not telling you shit," he gasped.

Gaz leaned out of the ship she had slipped into. "He's in the basement, remember? The door's straight through the living room; just go inside and head for the door across the room and to the right."

The Tallest nodded, handing Dib over to the alien that had piloted Gaz's ship down, and rushed into the house, followed by the two shorter Irkens. This one immediately snapped a pair of what seemed to be laser handcuffs onto the boy's wrists, and shoved him roughly into the very back of his ship.

"Gaz, how could you do this?!" Dib barked as the Irken tied him into the ship. "You've doomed the planet!"

The girl shrugged, turning her GameSlave back on.

"Come on! You've got to at least have a reason for selling out the human race!" Dib wailed.

"Zim said he knows a planet with awesome video games. It sounds cool."

Dib stared at his sister in horror. "...Video games? You brought about the extermination of Earth for video games?! Oh, come on!"

"Shouldn't you be happy, Dib? You're finally getting to see space, aren't you?" Gaz growled as the ship started back towards the Armada. "Although you probably are going to be killed for torturing an Invader, if you don't bleed to death from your eye first."

The boy swallowed nervously. He did seem to be losing a lot of blood... "Um...hey, Mr. Irken? D'you think I could get some bandages for this?" he asked.

The Irken laughed. "You think 'm gonna help someone the Tallest marked? I value my life, thanks. 'Ve only got ten rounds to retirement, and 'm not gonna screw that up."

Dib groaned unhappily, looking nervously out the window at the large blob of pink they were approaching. "Couldn't you at least have let me grab my glasses?"

~-~-~

Inside the house, the Irkens quickly crossed the room and moved into the basement. The Tallest slowly crossed the room, staring in sorrow at the green form on the table. When he reached the small Irken, he gently began untying the straps, taking in the battered appearance of Zim and running the back of a finger down his face. Zim blinked slowly, opening his eyes to look at the figure touching him. "Flurn..?" he murmured, lifting a newly-freed arm to touch the other's face. "Perhaps...Zim is dreaming," the small Invader said quietly, dropping his arm back down and drifting out of consciousness.

The other Irkens, medical drones, lifted Zim onto a foldout stretcher pulled from one of their Paks, and as soon as he was tied down to prevent any further injury, they ran from the basement to get him onto the ship. "Zim…" Flurn whispered sadly, as he followed the others out. "...I'm so sorry."

~*~

_Irken Round 9ZZR_

_Location: Planet Vort_

_Scientist Dormitories_

"_Zim? You awake?"_

_Zim jerked up in his bed, blinking and looking for the intruder in his room. He calmed when he saw Flurn and Shtirk in the doorway. "Of course I'm awake. Zim is always awake to see you, Flurn." He hopped off the bed, crossed the room, and wrapped his claws around Flurn's. "You haven't been around much lately, Shtirk. What brings you to Zim's domain today?"_

_Shtirk's mouth twitched a bit, and he nudged Flurn. "Come on, buddy. Ya gotta tell him."_

_Flurn nodded, leading Zim back to sit on his bed. There were a few minutes of awkward silence, during which Flurn tried and failed to speak several times._

"_What is it, Flurn?" Zim asked, leaning his head against the taller Irken's arm. "What do you need to tell Zim?"_

_Flurn sighed, scratching his chest. "Zim...I'm going to molt soon."_

_Zim was quiet for a minute. "So? I...Zim does not care how much taller his lover grows than him." His grip on Flurn's hand tightened._

"_I'm only a chek away from five marks, Zim," Flurn said softly, laying his head on top of the other's. "You're only two and a half."_

"_So?" Zim choked out, mentally berating the weakness he was showing._

"_So you know what the law is, Zim. A Tall and a Small cannot be mates." Flurn stopped speaking for a moment, pressing his eyes shut and breathing heavily. "If we don't stop this before it's too late, we'll both be deactivated. I'm sorry," he whispered, placing a kiss between Zim's antennae and rising from the bed._

"_Flurn...Flurn, wait," Zim called as his lover walked towards the door. "Flurn!" The taller Irken continued, with only a momentary pause showing that he'd even heard Zim say anything. "Three and a half rounds, Flurn! Nearly four! You would just turn your back on everything we've been through? You won't even fight for this?! For Zim?!" The scientist shrieked incoherently as his door closed._

_In the hallway outside, Flurn leaned against the wall. Shtirk patted his shoulder consolingly, wrapped an arm around him, and began leading him away from the dormitories. "Zim...I'm so sorry…" Flurn whispered sadly, as he followed the other out._

_~*~_

**I don't own Invader Zim. This is obvious. If I were Mr. Vasquez, I'd be too busy vomiting out of every orifice on my body from the sheer thought of Zim having a sexual relationship with any of the other characters to be typing this right now.**

**Short chapter is short. But we are now done with Earth! Into space we go! And we finally know who Flurn and Shtirk are. Awesomes. Because I'm so sure no one could figure that out before. Not like I had main characters selected from the drop-down menu or anything. . Of course not. That's just silly-thoughts.**

**Reviewers get to come with me into outer space. We can drink space soda, and ride giant alien bunnies! The bunnies demand your nourishing reviews!**

**And to my dear, lovely sister-beta! Go over chapter six for me already! How long've you had it now? I need it next weeeeek!**


	6. Arc 1: Chapter 6

Irken Round 19ZZR

Location: Milky Way Galaxy

Currently Passing Planet Mars

Green eyelids fluttered, and Zim heard the quiet 'shf'ing of Irken medical equipment. Strange. Had he been in the human's home for so long he was beginning to hallucinate, now? Rolling his eyes towards a small window, the Irken saw Earth a ways off. So that was it. He'd had this dream a few times since Dib captured him, and the planet should be exploding in three...two...one...

A supernova-esque explosion engulfed the ball of blue and green at just the moment Zim expected, and his lips twitched a bit. Definitely this dream again, then. In that case, Flurn should be showing up any moment to tend to his wounds, and so the Invader turned away from the window to wait.

After several long minutes, Zim started getting confused. Flurn had always shown up by this point in the dream; bandaging him while showering him in apologies for shattering what little heart the smaller boy had been willing to go against his Pak and show. Zim decided that perhaps the dream was a bit different this time, and he'd have to find Flurn on his own.

An attempt to shove himself up into a sitting position failed, and Zim realized that his bonds had followed him into his dreams this time. Another Irken, a bit shorter than Zim, came over at his movement, and pressed down on his chest. "Stay still, Invader! You need to heal."

Zim gave a short bark of laughter. "Why should Zim...stay put in his dreams? Hm? This is the only way he can do...anything lately, so leave me alone!" He jerked away from the other's touch, and immediately regretted moving. The wounds that Dib-pig had given him seemed to have stayed intact in the dream as well. Odd. That...had not happened before.

The medical drone snapped her fingers, and a table-headed drone rushed over. The medic took a small tube from the other, smearing a pale yellow gel across her fingers, and began rubbing it into Zim's forehead. The Invader closed his eyes; enjoying the pleasant, numbing effect the gel spread throughout his body. "It's all right now, Invader. This isn't a dream, and you'll be able to do plenty more once you've been able to heal properly. Now get some rest," she murmured, rubbing the last of the gel into Zim's skin and dropping the tube back onto the table-headed drone.

Zim wasn't quite sure he was able to believe what the drone was saying to him, but it certainly seemed like a nice thought. And he had gotten the Dib's sister to agree to help him. As he drifted into a sleep induced by the gel, he had to think that it would be nice if he wasn't dreaming after all.

~-~-~

Shtirk watched from the front windows of the Massive as Earth exploded in a blaze of fire and garbage. His lips curled back in disgust at how much filth had just been spewed into space, and he gave a quick order to a drone to make sure all the pollutants were blasted by the ship's lasers. Supposedly, Irk had been made into the unlivable ball of dirt it was today by the debris falling from a nearby bit of space that had housed a heavily polluted planet, until one of the planet's stupid inhabitants had accidentally blown the whole thing into nothing. Shtirk personally didn't believe the tale, but it was still a nasty thought.

A door leading from the main deck opened with a quiet 'shwoop', and Shtirk turned to see Flurn enter, followed by the human girl. Her face was buried in some primitive gaming device, and Shtirk frowned. Didn't she realize just whose presence she was in? The red-eyed Irken cleared his throat, raising an eye ridge at the girl. Flurn nudged her, and she sighed, flicking the game's power switch, and slipped it into a pocket. "So. You fixed a Spittle Runner, huh?"

"I guess," the human replied, looking around the deck. "Nice place you got."

Shtirk smirked. "Thanks. I decorated myself." Hovering across the floor, he looked down at the girl, inspecting her. "You have a name, human?"

"Gaz."

"Okay then, drone-in-training Gaz. Let's give you a quick test; make sure you actually can work on our equipment."

Gaz sighed. "Can you make it quick? I've tried a million times to kill Count Pigula, and he keeps killing me with acid vomit. I'd like to get back to that."

"Pause as soon as he opens his mouth. He'll be frozen for five seconds when you start it back up," Flurn said, leading Gaz across the deck.

"You've played Piggy Hunters 8?" Gaz asked in surprise.

"Oh, yeah," Flurn replied. "The Miyamotians send their games through the whole universe. Your planet was one of the last to get anything, I guess. That one came out ages ago."

Shtirk cleared his throat again, frowning at the other two. "If you're finished, can we move on?" Flurn grinned sheepishly, nodding and pushing Gaz forward. "Okay. Now, we'll give you one week to fix everything here," he said, pulling a sheet off a rather large table, "and if you can do it, you get the technician job. And that's an Irken week. Earth's orbit was pretty fast compared to the rest of the universe, so I'd estimate it to be about six or so weeks for you."

Gaz nodded, picking up some sort of gun that was broken in two. "And if I don't?"

"We shoot you out the airlock."

"Shtirk!"

"What?" Flurn glared at the red-eyed Tallest.

"Don't worry about me; I'll be fine," Gaz said boredly, picking up the other half of the gun to see how it would go together. "I got this."

Flurn looked at Shtirk nervously before slowly nodding. "Okay. Don't think Shtirk's kidding, though; got it?"

Gaz glanced at the Irken for a moment before rolling her eyes and turning back to the equipment.

"Come on, Flurn. Let's leave her to it," Shtirk said, wrapping an arm around the purple-eyed Tallest's shoulders and leading him back towards their rooms.

~-~-~

Several hallways over, Zim woke up again. He glanced around the small, white room he was in, easily recognizing it as a healing quarters, but unsure as to how he'd arrived in it. A female medical drone walked over to him, and Zim realized it was the same one who'd told him his dream wasn't a dream earlier. "Hello, Invader. How are you feeling?" she asked quietly, smoothing a squishy purple ball between his left antenna, and the small nub that had been left of his right.

"Tired," Zim murmured. "You were in Zim's dream earlier."

The drone smiled, pulling the ball back off and studying it. "I believe I told you that you weren't dreaming, remember? And according to this, you're in fairly good shape, considering that you were captured by an alien. You're a lucky man."

Zim perked his antenna a bit at that. "If I have been taken...from the Dib...then where is Zim now?"

"Zim is on board the Massive, in the Tallests' personal healing quarters," the drone replied, opening a small tub of pale pink salve and rubbing some on the nub. "Tallest Flurn was quite upset when he learned what had happened to an Invader. He insisted that we come down and get you before destroying the planet."

A warmth spread in the bottom of Zim's squeedlyspooch, and the small Invader decided it was probably connected to the pleasantly numbing affect the salve was having on his head. "So...the Dib has been killed..?"

"I'm not sure, actually," the drone said, closing the salve and checking a bag of something that was slowly draining into Zim's bloodstream. "There were two humans brought onto the ship, I think. If I had to guess, I would say that this 'Dib' was probably the one with the black fur on his head. It was so strange, too; his head was so large, and the fur barely covered the top. The other human's fur covered her entire head, except the face. The male was bleeding quite badly from his face, and Tallest Flurn barely let me put a patch on to keep him from bleeding to death. I think he's in a holding cell."

Zim nodded. "That is the Dib." He breathed a heavy sigh, feeling his mind slip away again. "Are you giving Zim...sedatives..?" he asked, struggling to stay awake.

The drone smiled, tapping the bag. "It'll be easier on you if you sleep for a while. We need to speed your outer skin's hardening, and it'll be a painful process. Just rest, and let us take care of you. All right?"

The Invader's eyes slowly slipped closed. He hadn't let anyone take care of him in years. Perhaps...letting someone do that would be all right just this once.

~-~-~

Shtirk sighed, laying back in bed. "That was fun," he murmured, nuzzling a cheek against one of Flurn's antennae. The younger male snuggled into the blankets. Shtirk smirked, poking the forehead peeking out from under the covers. "C'mere."

Flurn wriggled out from under the blanket, smiling shyly at his lover. "Yes?"

"You were pretty feisty just now. What's got you so riled up, hm?" the red-eyed Irken asked, pulling the other closer.

Flurn shrugged a little. "I dunno. Just the excitement of being off the Massive for once, I guess," he said, tilting his head back to let Shtirk nibble at the base of his neck. "One of us should go check on Zim, y'know," he murmured.

"Ah, leave him be," Shtirk grumbled. "They'll probably have him knocked out anyway."

Flurn wriggled out of the other's hold with a sigh. "I know, but we just brought all the ships down here to get him. The least we can do is make sure he's been settled in."

Shtirk frowned as the purple-eyed Irken dressed himself. "Fine," he sighed. "I'll be here when you're done." Flurn hovered over, rubbing the tip of an antennae against the top of Shtirk's head.

"I won't be long," he said quietly, before turning and leaving the room.

The red-eyed Tallest glared at the door for several minutes after Flurn had left. If all it took was a couple of hours of Zim being on the ship to start undoing all of Shtirk's work from the past ten rounds to get Flurn over that little defect, he was going to have to do something about it, and do something fast.

~*~*~

**I don't own Invader Zim. This is obvious. If I were Mr. Vasquez, I'd be too busy vomiting out of every orifice on my body from the sheer thought of Zim having a sexual relationship with any of the other characters to be typing this right now.**

**Short chapter again. But that's how I roll. *puts on sunglasses and poses all awesome-like* Drop a review on your way out, and I won't set the rabid spider monkeys on you.**


	7. Arc 1: Chapter 7

Zim sighed irritably. It had been five days since the Massive had picked him up, and while staying in the healing quarters was an immense step up from the Dib's basement, it was also horrendously boring. No one else was there but the medical drones, and they were too busy to talk to Zim much. It was always so quiet. Nothing but the noise of the machines to keep him company. Gaz hadn't stopped by, but Zim had expected that. He could vaguely remember Tallest Flurn visiting the first night he'd been there, and telling him that she'd been given a mass of work by Tallest Shtirk to test her capabilities. He'd had quite a bit of painkillers in his system at the time, though; so he wasn't entirely certain how much of what he remembered from the visit had actually happened.

He sighed again, flitting his eyes around the room. White walls. White floors. White machinery. White beds. White ceiling. No windows, even, to break the constant white up a bit. Zim couldn't even sit up without being hit by a crushing dizzy spell. He'd underestimated how useful his antennae were to balance, and now, with one missing, he couldn't attempt anything close to a vertical position. And to top everything off, it had been too long since Dib had taken the regeneration controls out of his Pak, and so nothing Zim had lost would grow back. One of the drones had mentioned something about Vort having excellent prosthetic antennae, but Zim was sure they'd probably be extremely pricey. It wasn't like the business would be thriving, anyway. It wasn't often that an Irken had their Pak's regeneration software disabled for as long as he had.

Zim frowned, closing his eyes. He may as well get some more sleep. There wasn't much he could do lying down, and he didn't expect to be having any visitors anytime soon.

"MASTER!!!"

Zim's eyes snapped open as a small, gray body launched itself onto his abdomen. He gasped in pain, lifting his head a bit and being greeted by a large grin and big blue-green eyes. "GIR?"

The robot's smile widened, and he wrapped his arms around the Irken's head. "You been gone so long! I made pretty dresses for mah tacos! Wanna see?!"

Zim grunted in pain as GIR's grip tightened, and pushed angrily at the robot's chest. "No, GIR! Release me!"

Surprisingly, GIR actually let go of Zim's head, settling into a sitting position at the foot of the bed. He opened his chest, pulling out a burrito wrapped in some hideous floral-print material, and waved it around happily. "This's Mary! I got her from the Tallest!!" He laughed happily, stuffing it into his mouth.

"That's quite nice, GIR. Now get off Zim's feet," the Invader growled. The robot's only reply was to tilt his head to the side, and pull another burrito from his chest. He held it out with a large, open-mouthed grin, dripping beans onto Zim's chest. Zim grimaced, taking the snack. He'd never been particularly fond of burritos, even when made with Irken ingredients, but it did seem more appetizing at the moment than what the drones had been feeding him. Plus, it was the surest thing to keep GIR even remotely calm. "Thank you, GIR," he mumbled, taking a small bite of the offending wrap.

GIR giggled madly, jumping off the bed and running across the room. "Hi lady!" he screamed, diving out of Zim's view. A shriek was followed by a crash, and more screams. Zim smiled to himself, continuing to nibble at the burrito. This was more like it.

~-~-~

Flurn stood outside the healing quarters, listening to the medical drones screaming and trying to escape the insane robot he'd unleashed on them. The violet Tallest couldn't help but feel a bit guilty about that, but the look of contentment he could see Zim wearing from the doorway was more than enough to make up for it. He smiled to himself, feeling a warmth deep in his squeedlyspooch. After a few moments, he realized that he'd been staring at Zim for nearly five minutes, and shook his head. This wasn't good. He couldn't let himself fall in love with Zim again. With a small sigh, he turned and left the hallway, resolving to keep as far away from the smaller Irken as he could until he and Shtirk decided what to do with him.

After wandering the ship for a few minutes, Flurn came across the room they'd given Gaz. He paused for a moment, deciding whether he should check in and see how she was doing with her test, or leave her be. When his thoughts started drifting back to Zim, the Tallest decided watching her work would probably be a welcome distraction, so he knocked and opened the door.

"What do you want?" the girl asked. She was lying on her bed, playing her GameSlave and facing away from the door.

"Just thought I'd see how you're doing with fixing all that stuff Shtirk gave you," he said, glancing around the room. "You paint in here?" The walls were a rather sloppy-looking blackish-purple, rather than the pink they'd been when she arrived on the ship.

Gaz paused her game, rolling her eyes and sitting up. "One: I'm done with all that. Been done for two days. Two: Yes, I painted. I hate pink. Can I go back to my game now?"

Flurn walked over to the pile of fixed equipment Gaz had made near the door. "That only took you three days? Impressive." He picked up a mini-television, flicking it on and flipping through various channels. "You gotta be more respectful when Shtirk comes in, though. I don't really mind that much, but his ego's the size of Planet Blorch. He wasn't kidding about the airlock thing."

"Whatever."

Flurn shrugged, turning the TV off and setting it back on the pile. "Okay. You still playing Piggy Hunters?"

"Yeah," the girl growled. "I think one of your stupid drones stole the rest of my games. I can't find them."

"I'll ask around, if you want. See if I can find anything," Flurn offered, walking back towards the door. Gaz nodded briefly, mashing away at her GameSlave's buttons. The Tallest gave a quick nod in return, slipping out of the room.

~-~-~

"It just isn't fair, Fleem," Shtirk growled. "He left Zim rounds ago. We've been together for five! Less than three hours, and he was already running off to go back to that defect's side."

Fleem sighed. "Shtirk, don't do this..." She stood up, crossing the room and wrapping her arms around the male from behind. "Come on. Not now."

Shtirk shrugged Fleem's arms off, pressing his lips together angrily. "When should I do it, then? You're the only one who knows about all this. Who else am I supposed to go to about this, huh?"

"You can talk to me about this, but can it not be when we're together like this? Please?" Fleem asked quietly, sitting back down on her bed.

"Together like what?" the Tallest barked. "You know for a fact that I don't care about you. We wouldn't even be mates if you weren't the Taller." He sighed, shaking his head.

Fleem pulled a dark orange shirt over her head. "If you hate this damn tradition so much, why don't you just abolish it? You are the Tallest, after all."

"We've been over this, Fleem. In order to pass any laws, Flurn and I first have to agree on what we want, and then get it past the Control Brains; and they won't budge on any old traditions, especially when it comes to mating. Small can't mate with Tall, the Tallest mates with the Taller, Invaders have their genitals removed before leaving Devastis to prevent them mating with the species they should be conquering, and so on."

"You know," Fleem snapped, pulling a pair of dark brown pants up and tying them closed, "I think you're only so upset about this because Zim isn't Small anymore. There's no law against a Tallest taking another mate aside from the Taller; and co-Tallest, in this case; so you're just scared he's going to go back to Zim, and you'll only get to be with him when Zim isn't around." She spun to face him, glaring. "If you want to bitch about this so badly, then go bitch to Flurn, and leave. Me. Out of it." She shook her head angrily, turning and sweeping from the room. Shtirk snarled, slammed a fist into the wall, then hissed at the resulting pain in his knuckles.

~-~-~

Zim hummed quietly to himself, sucking at a Licky-Stik GIR had snuck him. It had been another week since arriving on the Massive, and the medical drones had been helping him with a bit of some old practice called 'physical therapy'. It was an out-of-date technique, thanks to the Paks healing Irkens' wounds as quickly as they did, but seemed to actually be quite useful in Zim's case. He was slowly gaining back the ability to stand up without falling over, and the female drone insisted that he would probably be up and about within a month if all went well.

Currently, he could hear said drone yelling, along with a few others, at GIR. Again. Seemed he'd gotten into a cabinet full of medicine and eaten anything he could reach, and was now projectile vomiting in the medical drones' living quarters.

The Invader smirked to himself at the thought. It was always entertaining to see someone else having to deal with the robot.

The Gaz had been in to visit Zim a couple of times. He'd been impressed to hear how quickly she'd completed Tallest Shtirk's test work. It had also been rather entertaining to listen to her complain when Shtirk had made her start wearing a technician's uniform. Gaz had been quite vocal about her opinion that the uniform was 'The most hideous thing she had ever been forced to wear in her entire life', and her wishes to change back into her cargo pants and t-shirt.

A crash came from the drones' quarters, and GIR came running out, diving under Zim's bed and giggling madly. Two female drones and one male came out after him, looking absolutely furious. "Invader, can you please control your SIR unit?! It's going to take us days to clean our quarters, and we'll have to buy replacements for all the medicine it ruined!" the male growled.

Zim shrugged, biting the Licky-Stik in half and chewing noisily. "GIR doesn't seem to understand orders. Never has. You'll just have to learn to deal with him, as Zim did."

One of the female drones sighed. "And how do you deal with it?"

"Give him tacos, television, and hope that's enough to hold his attention. Not much else you can do, really."

The other female drone hissed angrily. "If you can't control it, we're going to lock it out of this part of the ship. We can't keep dealing with this!"

Zim frowned at that. "Tallest Flurn already told you to let him stay with Zim. Your threats do nothing to threaten me."

The drone gave another hiss at that, glaring at the giggling mass of metal peeking out from under the bed. "I hate your robot. I hate it!"

"Go on hating him all you like, drone. Zim does not care for your opinion. Now go. You should start cleaning your quarters before the smell sets in and your carpets stain, shouldn't you?"

The other female drone sighed, rubbing between her antennae. "Just try to control it a little, won't you? Do what you can. Okay?" She nodded to the others, turning and walking away from Zim's bed. "Come on. He's right; we should be getting that cleaned as quickly as we can." The other drones nodded reluctantly, glaring at the Invader, before slowly starting back towards their rooms.

GIR stuck more of his head out from under the bed, making eye contact with his master, and the two shared a grin.

~*~*~

**I don't own Invader Zim. This is obvious. If I were Mr. Vasquez, I'd be too busy vomiting out of every orifice on my body from the sheer thought of Zim having a sexual relationship with any of the other characters to be typing this right now.**

**Roar! The first arc is nearly over. Enjoy being on the Massive while you still can, folks. And hey! Zim's little friendly from the past has grown up to be the Taller. Sweet stuffs, huh? And yes; I'm aware that the idea of having a Taller to accompany the Tallest is completely unoriginal and lazy storytelling. However, I also do not care. So deal with it. Hahaha!**

**Also, a final note: I've made some changes to terms used in the Irken calender. Years are 'rounds', and I'm going through past chapters to make them match. I don't remember what all I've mentioned from their calender, but there's an explanation of it in the next chapter. If I've just confused you all even more than I'm sure I usually do, ignore this bit of the note, and move on. That'd probably be for the best.**

**Leave a review before you go, would ya? Especially you people on AFF! I haven't gotten anything since chapter 3 from you guys! D8**


	8. Arc 1: Chapter 8

Nearly a month had passed since the destruction of Earth, and Zim found himself finally settling into the routine on the Massive. This followed the Irken clock, of course; the familiarity of which put Zim far more at ease than he'd been in all his time on Earth.

The Irken time system was far superior to the pork-smellies', with each day divided neatly into ten even units. The Earthlings had been so confusing; dividing their hours and months the way they did. It was much easier to go by tens. The Irken calender followed this rule as well as their clock; with ten days in what the humans had called their week, ten weeks in their 'month', and twenty 'months' in one 'year'. Oddly, the inferior planet had used the same words for their days and weeks, but used the other terms in place of tenhaf and round, and the closest equivalent to a hafround was one of the now-extinct planet's 'seasons', although Irk only had two, as opposed to the humans' four.

The medical drones would wake Zim at the first unit of the day, usually with requests for him to do something with GIR. He'd have some kind of bland, snack-less breakfast served to him, and GIR would go out to sneak something actually tasty for his master. Then the drones would put him through a few units of his 'physical therapy' before stopping for lunch. Tallest Flurn had taken to eating lunch with the smaller Irken, and while Zim was understandably wary about letting his leader grow close to him again, he couldn't exactly tell him to go away, so the Invader had decided to let it go and just enjoy the company. After lunch, Flurn would go back to his duties, and Zim could usually talk one of the female drones into taking him down to visit Dib.

The human was being held in the smallest quarters on board the ship. The Massive wasn't a prison ship by any stretch of the imagination, so while Dib was in much better conditions than Zim would like, it was the best they'd been able to do at such short notice. Dib was held in his room by an exploding collar, and a chain Flurn had one of the drones install through the palm of the boy's left hand, the other end of which was attached to the heavy, round bed in the middle of the room.

When Zim would visit, he would taunt the human however he could. The destruction of the Earth, the fact that he could move freely while the boy was stuck in place, the knowledge that Gaz had betrayed him, and jabs at the size of Dib's head(although those were growing a bit old by this point); they were all things Zim would go on about for as long as the drone would let him. Mostly Dib would just glare, one-eyed and furious, and refuse to do anything more to acknowledge the Irken, but Zim would occasionally find a spot that could get a reaction out of the human. It was quite funny on the Irken's first visit to point out Dib's failure after six Earth years of fighting, and that even after he seemed to have won, his victory had been torn out from under his feet before he could even do anything to really celebrate it. Dib had almost torn the chain out of his hand in a single lunge towards the door, and then dropped to the floor, howling in pain. The Irken hadn't gotten that good of a reaction since, but he was determined to find something that would.

After Zim finished with the Dib each day, or if he couldn't talk a drone into taking him in the first place, he'd have several units of free time before dinner. Most of this time was spent in the company of GIR or Gaz, tormenting the medical drones and playing video games. Zim liked to think he was getting rather good at slaying these Vampire Piggies, and GIR had nicked the human girl's other games when she wasn't looking, along with her extra Game Slave, and given them to Zim. He'd been planning to give them back after a while, but had abandoned that idea when she described just what she was going to do to whoever had taken them. It would be best for his health to just keep her from ever knowing he'd had anything to do with it.

Dinner was always the same indistinguishable matter as breakfast and lunch, followed by a short session of therapy, and then Zim would be forced down for the final three units of the day, drugged more often than not. Irkens didn't sleep often, and it was driving Zim insane to be made to do so for such long periods, and every night. If he laid down willingly, the drones wouldn't give him drugs, but he usually put up such a fuss they nearly had to strap him to the bed.

This particular day, the drones hadn't been willing to take Zim to Dib's room, and they'd distracted GIR by telling him there was a pig loose on the other side of the ship, and that he could keep it if he could catch it. Gaz had been being kept particularly busy by Tallest Shtirk, as well, so Zim found himself completely and absolutely bored. He'd run through the Solitaire program he'd installed in his Pak while on Earth nearly one hundred times since lunch, and that had been a mere one and a half units ago. There was no telescreen in the medical quarters' sleeping room, and Zim still couldn't hold his balance quite enough to risk going to the small entertainment room. He was just so bored being cooped up here. As horrible as Earth had been, Zim had at least been able to move freely in the outdoors. Irken minds weren't made to last in captivity. The Invader sighed, closing his eyes to bring the Solitaire game up onto his eyelids again.

A tap on the headboard of Zim's bed caught the Irken's attention, and he opened his eyes, glancing up. Red eyes were staring down at him from a very tall Irken, and Zim quickly pushed himself into a sitting position. "Ah, My Tallest! What brings you to Zim's quarters?"

Shtirk smirked briefly. "Just wanted to ask about what all you did on your...mission. You didn't report in to us for nearly a hafround. In fact, I'd guess the last time you did call us was a little before you molted." He cocked an eye ridge, frowning slightly at the smaller Irken.

Zim tensed a bit. "Oh. No, My Tallest; I didn't molt until one or two Earth months before the Dib made me his prisoner. I was just very busy with my plans for destroying their world, and must have...lost track of time."

"Right. What was this plan that kept you from realizing a hafround had gone by without you contacting us?"

"..My plan?"

"Yes, Zim. What was it?"

"What was...Zim's plan?"

Shtirk fought the urge to slam his head into the wall. "Yes, Zim. What was your plan? Quit stalling and tell me, or your SIR is going out the airlock."

"Ah. Yes. Well, you see, Zim was growing a bacteria. To put in the skool's lunches." Zim paused for a moment, thinking frantically. "It would have made their eyes grow fur, and then when the entire population was blind, Zim would start a company selling eye-razors, and use my power over their sight to rule them all!"

Shtirk blinked slowly, looking unconvinced. "Uh-huh..."

Zim smiled nervously.

"How'd that go?" the Tallest asked.

"Eh? How'd what go?"

Shtirk growled. "Your plan, Zim. The eye-fur?"

"Oh! Yes! Zim's plan. Well, it took quite a long time to perfect, and was just so veeery close to being complete when the Dib managed to capture me. In fact, I had been planning to implement it the very next day."

"Okay then. How'd he catch you, anyway? You may be one of the worst Invaders Irk has ever seen, but he's still just a hyuman."

"It was an amazing battle, My Tallest. The Dib likes to think he knows whatever I'm doing, whenever I'm doing it, but he doesn't. So, he followed me home from skool one day, and tried to shoot my head clean off with some kind of lazer-gun the hyumans had developed. He missed, of course; and Zim attacked back with the guns in my Pak. It was almost a struggle, but eventually I managed to shoot him in the heart, and he exploded. Humans explode when their heart is destroyed."

Shtirk cocked an eye ridge. "You killed him."

Zim nodded proudly.

"How did he capture you, then?"

Zim's antenna drooped nervously. "Eh?"

"If you killed him, how was he able to capture you, torture you, and get us brought down here to save your sorry Pak?"

The Invader blinked a few times. "Oh. Oh, yes! Yes. Exploding does not kill the hyumans; they come back to life shortly afterwards. There was this one boy that Zim once used happy-exploding-goo on, and he came back after about a week. Oh, how Zim loathed that boy..." The Irken trailed off, grumbling under his breath.

"Zim!" Shtirk barked, restraining himself so much from just smacking the Irken upside the head. He didn't deserve the touch of a Tallest, and Shtirk was not about to give it to him.

"Oh yes! Apologies, My Tallest. You see, Zim forgot that the hyumans come back from exploding, and so was caught off guard when the Dib was up and moving. He managed to stun me, pry off my Pak, and lure me into his home to get it back. Then, while I was reattaching it, he sprayed some horrible acid on Zim's face, which knocked me out, and when I woke, I was in his laboratory, strapped to a table."

"...." Shtirk was silent for a moment, before deciding it would be best to get away from Zim's black hole of stupid while he still could. "Well, I think that's all I need from you, Zim. I'll see ya around," the red-eyed Tallest said, turning away from the smaller Irken's bed and leaving the medical quarters.

Once out of the sick bay, Shtirk smiled to himself. Now to visit the hyuman, and see if he could find any inconsistencies in Zim's story.

~*~*~

**I don't own Invader Zim. This is obvious. If I were Mr. Vasquez, I'd be too busy vomiting out of every orifice on my body from the sheer thought of Zim having a sexual relationship with any of the other characters to be typing this right now.**

**Rgh. Short chapter. Again. And nothing in this one was even planned; I don't quite know what happened. I guess my inner muse realized that not much of my planned chapter would make sense, and gave me this instead. It's also demanding I rework what I had planned for this chapter before putting it in the next. So be pleased; you get an extra chapter in the story. ^^ Aren't you all lucky? Now leave a review, okay? See ya next week!**

**Edit: To 'The Random Reviewer': You seem to be forgetting that Zim is an Irken. The Irken want to rule the universe, and they don't care how many they kill in order to do it. They don't care that they finally destroyed Earth 'just because' a human beat the shit out of Zim. True, it's not fair that Dib, Gaz and Dwicky, wherever he may be out there, are the only humans left, but the thing is, the only person in this story who cares about that is Dib. He's not happy about it. He's not going to be happy about it. He will show this in future chapters. I'll post this again in the next chapter in case you don't see it here, but in the future, show a little backbone and actually log in to leave your review. I won't come to your page and start flaming you over it, and even if I did, it would as simple as reporting me for abuse for doing it. /rant  
**


	9. Arc 1: Chapter 9

Another week came and passed with nothing of interest happening, and Zim growled. He could walk a fair amount on his own now, but the drones didn't want him going off without someone to help, and so he was still restricted to mostly bed rest. Gaz was sitting on a bed next to the Irken's, playing her GameSlave, and GIR had disappeared to the entertainment room to watch TV. Zim was so bored. So very bored. Being perpetually stuck in this state hadn't done anything to make the Invader grow used to it, and Gaz wasn't doing anything to help. He sighed loudly, and the girl glanced up for a second.

"Yes?"

"Zim is bored," the Irken stated, crossing his arms. "Rectify this."

"Okay," Gaz grumbled, thinking for a moment. "Explain your time system to me."

Zim cocked an eye ridge. "That would be boring. Why should Zim explain such simple things?"

"Well, you told me to give you something to do. I've got a basic understanding, but I don't get how I'm going to age off of Earth," the human barked, mashing buttons on her game. "Shtirk said Earth was about six times faster than everything else, so does that mean I'm going to die six times faster? Live six times longer? What?"

The Irken thought for a moment. "I believe Gaz will probably age six times more slowly than you did on Earth. Most of you hyumans' reasons for growing old so quickly was due to your poor diets and high gravity, so Zim doesn't see why you wouldn't live longer out here."

"All right," Gaz said, switching her game off as the credits played. "So, my birthday was coming up when the planet was destroyed. When would it be now?"

Zim tilted his head to the side, lifting his antenna curiously. "Birth day?"

"You know. Birth day. Exactly what it sounds like. The day you're born?"

"Ah!" Zim smirked. "You mean your Activation Ceremony."

"I guess."

"The same distance away that it would have been on Earth. Why would it be different?" Zim said, rolling onto his stomach. His back was getting stiff from lying still for so long.

Gaz frowned, ready to argue that it wouldn't actually be. Earth days didn't divide evenly into the Irken's calender. She opened her mouth for a moment, thought better, and decided to just go along with Zim. It would be easier than trying to convince him he was wrong, anyway. "Okay then, Zim. In that case, you owe me a visit to this Miyamotian planet for my birthday present in three days."

"Prezzunt?" Zim asked, tilting his head again.

"Yeah. Birthday present." The two were silent for a few seconds, and Gaz sighed. "Let me guess. This 'Activation Ceremony' doesn't include presents?"

Zim shook his head. "Zim does not know what these prezzunts are. Explain!"

Gaz clenched her teeth for a moment. She was not going to miss out on a birthday present just because this stupid alien was too stupid to buy her something, and if she did, he was going to regret it. "A present is something you buy for people you like. Remember that whole Santa thing? You were throwing presents left and right. People give out presents on holidays and birthdays."

"And why should Zim give you a prezzunt for your birth day?"

"Because," Gaz growled, "when I helped you out of our basement, you said you'd take me to this Miyamotian planet, and if you don't, you will wish more than anything that you had." She walked from the other bed over to Zim's, glaring at the Irken. "Got it?"

Zim recoiled a bit as Gaz leaned over him. "Zim will take you to the Miyamotians; don't worry. I don't know if we will be able to go soon; we can't just demand that the Massive take a detour to go, and the medical drones still refuse to let Zim out on his own."

Gaz smirked. "Well, aren't we lucky, then. I've been talking to Flurn, and he says not only are we going to be pretty near Miyamotia tomorrow, but he wants to go down and pick up a new game. I think he could probably convince the drones to let you go for a day."

The Irken felt a flash of excitement in his squeedlyspooch at the idea of a whole day spent with Flurn, and quickly tried to crush it back down. Flurn wasn't interested in a short little bug like Zim; he'd proven that a long time ago. Even if they had eaten lunch together for almost a month. The taller Irken was probably just trying to be friendly. They had been close once, so Flurn probably just wanted to rekindle their friendship. And besides, Zim was sure that all the little brushes Flurn had made against the smaller male's skin had been accidental. Flurn had always been terrible at flirting, and rather oblivious about physical things.

The Irken nodded to Gaz. "All right then. Zim shall accompany you and the Tallest to the Miyamotians! A hyuman like yourself will need protecting against the inhabitants, after all." He could deal with being with Flurn for a day. He just had to keep a handle on himself, and make sure he didn't do anything stupid.

~-~-~

Zim spent the next morning's therapy session bragging happily about how he was going to be able to leave the ship for a few units. The drones weren't allowed to leave unless the Tallest personally gave them a vacation, and Flurn hadn't given them any special permissions like he had given to Zim. After lunch, Flurn was going to have Gaz re-install the spider legs on Zim's Pak, and then they'd be on Miyamotia until dinner. The drones patiently nodded through the Invader's ramblings, happy that he'd said he would be taking his defective SIR unit onto the planet with him. An afternoon without that broken piece of machinery would be more than enough of a vacation for them, thank you very much; so when it came time to see the small group off of the ship, the drones almost didn't mind when GIR knocked over three shelves in the healing quarters in its excitement. Almost, anyway.

Zim happily lifted himself into the Shuver they would be taking off the Massive with his newly-replaced spider legs, smiling at how smoothly they moved. His old ones had been in rather poor shape since his molt. They hadn't been made to hold an Irken much taller than about three and a half marks. These new ones, however, would hold up to six marks, so long as the Irken using them didn't let themselves get overweight.

Settling himself into the front side seat, Zim retracted the legs, and delegated GIR to the back. Most ships only had one seat in the front, and the Invader wasn't about to let this opportunity pass by. Riding 'shotgun', as he'd heard hyuman children argue for, was a rare pleasure, and apparently the hyumans had viewed it as the same position of power the Irkens did.

Gaz was the next to climb into the ship, snatching the driver's seat for herself. GIR squealed happily, trying to climb over the seats to the girl, but Flurn pulled the robot back as he settled in the back. "Shtirk's had you fly some of our spare ships to get some practice in, right?" the purple-eyed Irken asked as the Shuver automatically strapped him into place.

The girl gave her head a brief shake as she glanced over the controls. "No, but I figured out your Spittle Runners and something of Zim's without any problems. This'll be a piece of cake."

The Irkens exchanged slightly nervous looks as Gaz started the ship up, and the Massive opened to let them out. Gaz smirked, grabbing something that looked quite similar to a joystick, and slammed it forward until it was nearly horizontal, and the Shuver took off, GIR laughing madly, and the Irkens on board shrieking in terror.

~-~-~

".......You're not driving back to the Massive."

Gaz rolled her eyes, frowning. "Why not, you big baby? I got us here fine."

Flurn stared wide-eyed at the hyuman for a moment, fingers still digging into the Shuver's seat. "Barely!" He spun to Zim, who was still shaking a bit. "You're driving back. Don't let her have the controls. That's an order." The Invader nodded slightly, carefully lifting himself from the ship with his spider legs, and instructing GIR to stay put. They didn't need to be paying for anything he broke. Flurn sighed, forcing himself to release the seat, and stepped out of the ship. "Okay. All right. We're alive. Now, come on. I need to get my copy of Dookiebon: Soulblack before they run out of Mactopus figures."

Gaz snorted as they started towards the nearest store. "Dookiebon? That game's for babies, and each one's exactly the same! A bunch of new freaks to catch, and the same path through the game."

"It is not," the Irken argued. "There's a lot more to the games than catching the Dooks! You can train them and breed them, and most of the fun comes from making them fight other players, anyway."

"Whatever," the hyuman sighed as they walked into the store. "Zim, you're gonna buy me whatever the newest GameSlave they have is, and some games for it."

A large gray blob wriggled over to the girl, coming to a sort-of stop in front of her. Gaz cocked an eyebrow at the creature. It had stopped wriggling, but it had somewhere around twenty tentacles coming off of it in all directions, and they were squirming a bit. The girl couldn't help remembering something kind of similar to it she'd seen on a DVD Dib had left in the living room when he was fourteen. That day had made her swear off anything that came from Japan except video games, and Dib's nose had never really healed quite right after she finished with him. The alien gurgled, and Gaz glanced at Zim. It gurgled again, followed by a few squeaks and another gurgle. "Hey, Zim? What the hell is this thing?"

The Irken glanced over, gave a quick nod at nothing in particular and carried himself over to the two. "This is a Miyamotian," he said before turning and gurgling back at the blob. They squeaked and gurgled back and forth for a few moments, and then started across the store. Zim motioned for Gaz to follow, and she did, glancing at Flurn who had already opened his new game and was starting it up on his GameSlave. "I've explained you need the latest Slave, so she just needs to know what kind of games you want." The hyuman nodded, looking over the shelves as they walked, occasionally reaching up and pulling something down.

About a unit later, Gaz had finally picked out all the games she wanted, so Zim paid for them and the GameSlave, told Flurn they were done, and they walked back to the Shuver. It had been about a unit and a half's flight from the Massive to the planet's surface, so Flurn suggested they just find somewhere to eat on Miyamotia before going heading back to the planet. After a short flight around the planet, with Zim driving this time, they found a Shloogorgh's, parked, and went in.

The group ate for a little while, chatting about the various goings-on of the Massive, and laughing at GIR stealing other people's food. None of his victims were stupid enough to yell at the Tallest over him, and so the restaurant emptied out fairly quickly. Gaz slipped off to the restroom after finishing her Vort dogs, smirking at the sight of GIR attempting to play the Doom song on the cash register.

Zim sucked lazily at his milkshake as a comfortable silence fell over him and Flurn. After a few moments, he jerked a bit, glancing under the table. A black-clad foot was gently nudging against his own boot, and the Invader's cheeks flushed a slightly darker green. "My Tallest..?"

Flurn's smile grew a little, and he brushed a little more firmly. "Yes, Zim?"

The Invader twitched slightly. "Zim's legs are still rather...sensitive from the Dib's treatment."

The purple-eyed Irken's smile disappeared, and he quickly pulled his leg back. The silence turned a bit awkward for a few moments before Flurn decided to try again, slowly walking his fingers across the table to the shorter Irken's. They met Zim's left hand, brushed gently against the bandages that the drones had wrapped it in, and curled around the two fingers remaining on it. Zim fought himself briefly before carefully slipping his hand out of the other's grip. "My Tallest, Zim does not think you should be doing this."

Flurn frowned slightly, pulling his arm back across the table. "Why not?"

Zim blinked at the taller Irken, and was silent for a few seconds. "You..." He stopped, looking away. "You hurt Zim," he murmured, sipping at his milkshake again. "What we had before was nearly all Zim had. He had you, and Fleem. Shtirk didn't like us being together, so Zim had already lost him, and after you left, Fleem didn't care much for Zim's constant screaming, and she left, too." He turned back, staring straight into Flurn's eyes. His antenna wilted against his skull unhappily. "You left him completely alone. How is Zim supposed to believe you won't just cast him aside when you get tired of him again, hm?"

Flurn's own antennae drooped, and he slid out of his side of the booth and into Zim's. He wrapped his arms around the smaller male's shoulders, murmuring his name over and over, and bent to press his forehead into the crook of Zim's neck. He remained like that for a long moment before pulling his head up, and tilting Zim's chin to make eye contact. "I did not want to leave you, Zim," he whispered. "It was only because I was growing. I was never tired of you. If I could have done anything to keep us together, and you safe, I would have, but I couldn't." He rubbed an antenna against Zim's before continuing. "I've tried for so long to convince Shtirk that the height restrictions on mates is ridiculous, but he won't even try to take it before the Control Brains. He just always says they won't budge, and refuses to even consider it."

He paused again, continuing to rub their antennae together. A pleasant, quiet humming came from where they touched. "I'm not going to ask how you had such a large growth spurt, because the how isn't important. What is, is that you're over five marks, and nobody can tell us no." He released the smaller Irken's antenna and shoulders, sliding in his seat to give Zim a little more space. "I don't expect you to forgive me quickly or easily, if at all, but...just know that if I could do things over again, I would take you, and fly wherever we'd have to that we could be together without being deactivated."

Zim was quiet for a moment. His brain was warning him not to trust Flurn; not after the pain he'd been in for so long. On the other hand, something warm and bubbly near his squeedlyspooch was screaming at him to just throw all caution to the wind and go back to what had made him happier than anything else ever had, before or since. He opened his mouth to say something, closed it, and repeated both actions. After a few times of doing this, he gave up, crawled into Flurn's lap, and touched the tip of his antenna against the base of Flurn's before settling against his chest. "Zim...I don't think I will forgive you yet, My Tallest," the Invader said quietly, "but perhaps with time. Time and contact." He nodded. Being able to just feel his lover had been one of the things he'd missed most after being left alone.

A happy squeal came from the cash register, and GIR came flying at them. "You so preshuuuus!" he cooed, wrapping his arms around Flurn's head. "You my mama now?!"

"Nah, that'd be Zim," Gaz said, sitting back down at the table with a basket of fries.

Zim glared at the hyuman, snatching a handful of her fries. "Zim is no female parental unit!"

GIR shrieked happily, wriggling against the back of Flurn's head. "Master's my mama!" he screamed before erupting into a fit of giggles and falling to the floor.

Two more baskets of fries and several failed attempts by Zim to make GIR stop calling him Mama later, the group decided they should get heading back, and walked back out to the Shuver. As they were climbing in, another Shuver came down, landing next to them, and three Irkens climbed out, and stood facing Zim. Flurn motioned to the others to wait for a moment before going over to see what they wanted.

"Can I help you?" he asked, looking down at them.

One soldier stepped forward, saluting. She glanced past the Tallest at Zim for a moment before motioning to the others who'd arrived with her, and addressing Flurn. "My Tallest, we've been sent to collect the Irken called Zim. Tallest Shtirk has determined him to be a criminal, and highly dangerous to the Irken hierarchy." The other soldiers surrounded Zim, clamping a pair of the same handcuffs they'd used on Dib before on his wrists, and started dragging him back towards their Shuver.

"Now, hang on one second!" Flurn barked. "We were just on our way back anyway, so he'll be fine coming with us, thanks. And how is Zim dangerous to the hierarchy?"

The soldier Flurn had been speaking with cocked an eye ridge. "That's classified information. Tallest Shtirk told us not to let anyone know what we were taking him for, and to make sure we brought him back to the Massive." She turned and started towards her Shuver, but was stopped when Flurn grabbed her shoulder.

"I'm a Tallest too, you know! If Shtirk gave you classified information, I'm high enough ranking that you will tell me what it is!" he yelled. "Now tell me, release Zim, and we'll bring him back!"

The soldier sighed, motioning at the others to continue what they were doing. "Tallest Shtirk said you might give us some trouble about this. He had wanted to inform you of this himself, but said we could tell you if we needed." She gently reached up, and slid Flurn's hand from her shoulder. "Tallest Shtirk realized this morning that he's going to molt sometime soon. He says you haven't shown any of the early signs of molting, and so until you do, you are to be regarded with Taller status, not Tallest. If you don't molt at all, your demotion will be permanent. Therefore, you do not have the right to know what Zim's crime is at this time, and cannot override our orders to bring him back ourselves." With that, she turned, climbed into the pilot's seat of her Shuver, and took off.

Gaz blinked slowly. "What just happened?"

"I..." Flurn stopped, blinking and swallowing. "I think I just lost Zim."

GIR glanced at his two remaining companions before turning and watching the Shuver quickly shrinking in the distance. "Mama?"

~*~*~

**I don't own Invader Zim. This is obvious. If I were Mr. Vasquez, I'd be too busy vomiting out of every orifice on my body from the sheer thought of Zim having a sexual relationship with any of the other characters to be typing this right now.**

**And the plot thickens. Man, I think I had more angst in that one paragraph where Zim was talking to Flurn than I've ever written in anything put together! Damn.**

**And to The Random Reviewer, once again, in case you've come back for my explanation and didn't go back last chapter and see this: ****You seem to be forgetting that Zim is an Irken. The Irken want to rule the universe, and they don't care how many they kill in order to do it. They don't care that they finally destroyed Earth 'just because' a human beat the shit out of Zim. True, it's not fair that Dib, Gaz and Dwicky, wherever he may be out there, are the only humans left, but the thing is, the only person in this story who cares about that is Dib. He's not happy about it. He's not going to be happy about it. He will show this in future chapters. In the future, show some balls and actually log in to leave your review. I won't come to your page and start flaming you over it, and even if I did, it would as simple as reporting me for abuse for doing it. It would keep me from having to spam my author's notes just to get a response to you. /rant**


	10. Arc 1: Chapter 10

**Oh hey. There's some cyborg-alien-sex-things in this chapter! Nothing so explicit that it's worth upping the rating over, I'm saving that for later chapters; but do know there's a little something in here.**

**Also, Dib. So quit asking for him! D8**

~*~*~

"Shtirk!"

The red-eyed Irken jumped slightly as the door to his room slammed open. He turned and saw Flurn standing in the doorway.

"What have you been doing?" the violet Tallest barked, crossing the room in a few quick strides. He'd foregone his hover belt when going out with the others that afternoon, and Shtirk had to admit he'd forgotten how intimidating the normally mild Irken could be when he moved like this.

"I'll guess it's safe to assume you spoke with Soldier Drek when she arrived for Zim?" Shtirk half-questioned, straightening and brushing off his robes.

Flurn gave a slight nod, glaring at his partner. "I don't have Tallest clearance anymore?"

Shtirk scratched his chest and sighed. "I'm going to molt, you haven't mentioned anything about yourself going to, and Zim is a threat. I did what I had to."

"How is he a threat?" Flurn asked, crossing his arms over his chest. "He's still recovering from that hyuman's treatment, and none of his Pak's weapons have been replaced! What could he possibly do?"

"It's not what he can do, Flurn. It's what he did do while he was on Earth," Shtirk replied, sitting down on his bed. "I had a very interesting talk with that hyuman boy this afternoon. Zim told me he molted a couple Earth months before he was captured. That would've been around the beginning of the cooling hafyear. Perfectly normal, although he did grow a bit more than normal for a single molt. Correct?"

Flurn nodded slowly. Where Shtirk was going with this, he wasn't sure, but it didn't seem good.

"Well, I thought it was rather suspicious that he went so long without contacting us. He gave me some story about trying to grow fur on the hyumans' eyes taking up too much time for him to call, and you know as well as I that his plans have never stopped him before." The Tallest paused, crossing his legs before continuing. "So I decided to see what the hyuman would say, and see how it matched up to what Zim told me. Care to know what he told me?"

"Shtirk, just say whatever it is you have to say already, and stop dragging it out," Flurn said, sinking into a chair near the door.

"He told me that Zim grew about ten Earth months before he caught him. That would've been right in the middle of the warming."

Flurn frowned. "That's impossible, Shtirk. The hyuman must have been lying. We only molt in the cooling."

"We only molt naturally in the cooling."

The purple-eyed Irken was quiet for a long moment. "What're you saying, Shtirk?"

"I'm saying Zim must have found some way to induce a molt on himself. I didn't tell the hyuman anything about our molting patterns, or any of what Zim told me, so he had no way to know what to lie about," Shtirk said calmly, placing an elbow on his knee and propping his head up. "According to him, Zim grew almost immediately after his height started causing suspicion among the hyumans at the training facility he was infiltrating. Pretty convenient timing, and combined with the fact that the medical drones have found some things off with Zim's Pak that they can't quite place, I have to think our little exile was doing some fairly illegal stuff on that planet."

"And you couldn't let me have clearance to be told that?" Flurn asked, his antennae wilting against the back of his skull.

"It's not very well-known that the Pak is what controls height, Flurn," the other said, rising from the bed and floating across the room. "I couldn't risk any other Irkens being around and overhearing if I let Drek tell you that. Other Irkens are smarter than Zim. If he could figure out how to induce a molt, they could, too. And they would know to do it in the cooling, to avoid suspicion. If word got out that it's possible to make yourself taller, it would become impossible to tell who was naturally Tall and who was just a liar." Shtirk sat down in his partner's lap, wrapping long arms around his shoulders. "Zim isn't good for you, Flurn. You aren't yourself when he's around," he murmured, rubbing the tip of an antenna against Flurn's cheek.

Flurn's antennae stiffened slightly when Shtirk sat down, and he forced them back into their previous wilting position as he spoke. Shtirk had always been easier to deal with if whoever he was dealing with was being submissive. "He was just trying to blend in better, Shtirk," the violet-eyed Irken insisted. "We're not going to send him on another mission, and what reason would he have to make himself molt again? He's Tall now, and even if he did grow taller than you, the Control Brains would never let someone with his history take power."

Shtirk snorted, pulling his head away from the other. "He's Tall now? Flurn, he's a liar and a cheat. He's no more Tall than he ever was hyuman. He just has a better disguise now." He stood up, staring down at Flurn. "If word gets out about what he's done, it could upset the entire hierarchy of the Irken race," the Tallest snapped angrily.

"Where is he?" Flurn asked quietly.

Shtirk closed his eyes for a long moment. "You don't need to know that, Flurn. If I tell you, you'll just run off to him, and start trying to find some way to get him out of this."

Flurn stood up, grabbed Shtirk by the front of his robes, and pulled him down to the floor. "Where is he?"

The red-eyed male was silent for several seconds before reaching to the other's hand, and prying his fingers loose. "It doesn't matter. We're switching course for Judgmentia. It should take us about three tenhafs to get there, and when we do, Zim will have a trial at the Spike of Judgment. The Control Brains will decide what to do with him from there. My advice would be to stay away from him, and get your head back together." Shtirk paused for a few seconds, hovering towards the door, and stopped before leaving. "Remember yourself, Flurn. It wasn't that long ago you would have been glad to see Zim at the Spike."

Flurn's antennae drooped as the door closed with a quiet click. He honestly didn't need a reminder of how horribly he'd treated Zim since Impending Doom I. He had never really wanted to, but after what Zim had done to one of the last remaining areas on Irk that were actually livable, it had been too easy to let his anger cover his feelings for the small Irken. Hating Zim had been a lot easier than loving him but unable to be with him, and the Invader hadn't even seemed to ever realize how terribly his leaders had treated him. Really, Flurn didn't even deserve to have Zim again.

No! Flurn shook his head, antennae pressed miserably against the back of his skull. He couldn't afford those kinds of thoughts. Not right now. He could address those issues later, but now, he had to find Zim, and figure out how to keep him alive.

~-~-~

"Shut your filthy pig-beast mouth!" Zim shrieked, digging his fingers into a black coat, and flinging the body wearing it across the room.

Dib gasped in pain as he smacked against the wall rather harshly, the ring in his hand pulling tightly. After a few seconds' recovery he chuckled, licking the fresh blood leaking from his palm, and wrinkled his nose at the taste. "What, Zim? I've had to put up with you for God knows how long, tied to this fucking bed. Don't you like getting a little in return?"

Zim snarled, diving across the room towards the hyuman. A chain around his throat tightened, jerking him back and to the floor, and the Irken coughed and choked, glaring at the stake Shtirk had made the drones install to hold him in place. They only had one exploding collar on board, and once it had been set to Dib's genetic make-up, it wasn't possible to change to anyone else's. Shtirk had been pretty upset when he found out they didn't have one to put on Zim, so his chain had just been tied directly around his neck.

Dib settled himself on the floor, just out of Zim's reach, and smirked. "So come on, Zim. Tell me how your little date went. You were so excited about it when you visited with my sister yesterday. What went so horribly wrong that you're locked in here with me now?" Zim clenched his jaw, glaring furiously at the hyuman. "What'd you do? Blow up a ship? Try to kill your leader?"

The Irken gave a shriek of fury, racing to the end of his chain and whipping out his spider legs. Dib jumped back at the flash of metal, not having realized Zim had gotten them replaced, but quickly realized he was too slow, and one of the legs sank into his shoulder. "I would never harm my Tallest, Dib!" Zim hissed, pulling the human closer. "I would sooner die." He lifted the metal limb, and the boy with it, gave it a quick swing above his head, and threw the hyuman across the room again. "If you have any brain-meats at all, you will stay over there."

Dib groaned, pressing a hand against the wound. "Shit," he murmured, watching blood ooze out around his fingers.

"You need a medical drone in here?"

Zim and Dib both looked towards the door, and saw Flurn peering in. Dib gave a nervous nod, and Flurn leaned out back out of the doorway for few moments before entering the room. "Someone'll come for you in a little bit," he told Dib, and then turned to Zim, crossing the room in several long strides. The Irkens began speaking quietly, and as much as Dib wanted to hear what they were saying, he didn't want to get anywhere near those spider legs again, so he just turned to face the doorway, and hope a drone would come soon.

"My Tallest...Flurn," Zim murmured, touching his antenna to the taller's cheek. "What on Irk is going on? Those soldiers refused to explain anything to Zim, and they made too much noise during my arrest for me to hear what the leader said to you."

Flurn gave a small smile, brushing his own antenna down against Zim's. "Apparently, Shtirk had a talk with the hyuman while we were gone. From what he was told, he's determined you couldn't have molted naturally on Earth, and must have found some way to make yourself molt. Also, he's apparently going to molt himself, so I've been demoted to Taller." Zim tensed, pulling his antenna back and looking away from Flurn. The taller Irken frowned, placing a hand on Zim's shoulder. "Zim...you didn't make yourself molt, did you?"

The Invader was quiet for a moment. "I had to. The hyumans would have found Zim out if I had stayed that small."

Flurn released Zim's shoulder, looking away and back several times before speaking. "We're on course for Judgmentia now, Zim. Shtirk's going to have you deactivated if he can, and since you really did somehow induce a molt, there's no way the Control Brains will let you off." Both Irkens were silent for a long moment before Flurn spoke again. "How'd you do it, anyway?"

"How did Zim make himself grow?" Flurn nodded. "It was simple. I merely had several five-minute work sessions on my Pak, adjusting the growth centers to put myself just tall enough that I would no longer attract suspicion from the hyumans. You can put in the figures you want for your height right down to the chek, you know."

"Zim," Flurn whispered, lowering his head to rub his antennae against the smaller Irken's forehead. "I can't lose you again. I'll figure out some way to get you out of this; I promise." The top panel of his Pak opened, and a thin cable snaked its way out, trailing around to touch Zim's Pak. The Invader's cheeks turned a light teal, and he glanced shyly at the highly confused hyuman across the room. "Let him watch," Flurn murmured, licking the skin next to Zim's antenna.

"All right," Zim responded, the top of his Pak opening and releasing a matching cable.

Across the room, Dib squinted, trying to watch the Irkens. He wasn't entirely sure what he was seeing, but it seemed pretty creepy and disgusting. The boy didn't really want to keep watching, but the floaty feeling in his head said he'd lost quite a bit of blood, and he needed something to focus on to keep from passing out. The cable from Flurn's Pak slid inside the open panel of Zim's, and the smaller male gave a low moan, followed by a sort of purring noise. Dib's face twisted as he realized just what exactly was happening, and he scrambled backwards a bit. Didn't Irkens have any shame?!

Dib turned to the door. That Tallest guy had said a drone would be by to take care of him; where were they? Squinting and blinking, the human realized he could see some kind of shape standing in the doorway. It was clearly an Irken, dressed in dark colors. The medical drones who'd made sure Dib wasn't about to die when he'd been brought on board had worn all white. "What are you doing?!"

Dib flinched at the sudden, clearly female voice stomping across the room. Zim and Flurn jumped, retracting their cables back into their Paks.

"Taller Flurn, this is a criminal! What on Irk do you think you were doing?"

Flurn stood up, keeping a hand on Zim's shoulder. "No point even trying to lie, is there?" he asked, glancing at the door. Several more Irken had gathered at the female's scream, and were peering in curiously. "I was sharing a cable with Zim, Soldier Drek."

Drek cocked an eye ridge, frowning at the males. "Have you been able to speak with Tallest Shtirk since returning from Miyamotia?"

"Yes I have," the taller Irken replied. "I know what Zim did, and I know why he's here." Flurn gently rubbed the back of Zim's head, staring the female down. "I also do not care in the least."

Drek gave a brief nod, motioning to a few of the Irkens in the hallway. "In that case, My Taller, I have no choice but to place you under arrest for both mating with a criminal and for inter-height mating," she barked, grabbing Flurn by the elbow and slamming him to the floor. She pulled off his gauntlets, taking a pair of handcuffs from one of the other Irkens coming into the room, and snapped them around Flurn's wrists. "Say bye-bye, Zim," she said in a bit of a sing-song, dragging Flurn towards the hallway. Halfway there, she stepped in a puddle of Dib's blood. "Oh, for...Would a medical drone please get in here and clean this up?!"

Zim snarled, diving towards Drek. Once of her back-ups whipped a gun out of their Pak, aiming it at Zim's forehead. "C'mon, defect. Try me," she hissed.

"Stand down, Zim!" Flurn ordered, following Drek without a struggle. "I'll be fine! Just stand down!"

The smaller Irken glanced between the soldier's gun and Flurn several times before heeding what he'd been told, and sinking to the floor. The other Irkens left the room, the door clicked shut, and Zim buried his face in his knees, forcibly separated from Flurn three times too many for one lifetime.

~*~*~

**I don't own Invader Zim. This is obvious. If I were Mr. Vasquez, I'd be too busy vomiting out of every orifice on my body from the sheer thought of Zim having a sexual relationship with any of the other characters to be typing this right now.**

**One more chapter in this arc, then I'll be taking a one-week break to get my ideas for the second arc finalized. Leave a review, and be assured you will probably hate me this time next Sunday.**


	11. Arc 1: Chapter 11

**I don't own Invader Zim. This is obvious. If I were Mr. Vasquez, I'd be too busy vomiting out of every orifice on my body from the sheer thought of Zim having a sexual relationship with any of the other characters to be typing this right now.**

**Author's note at the beginning, this time. I think it fits better here than the end. Remember, no update next week, and please don't flame too hard over this chapter. I won't blame you if you do, though; I had to wander my house chewing myself out after writing a certain scene about four and a half pages in and chug a Mountain Dew to get working again.**

**The Dew doesn't seem to be affecting me well, though. I got the shakes now. Whoo. Used to be able to chug four straight no problem, and now two's screwing me up. Damn you college budget. Why can't you allow for three 12-packs a week? I've lost my resistance to the sugar rush.**

~*~*~

Flurn sighed, staring out the window. He could just see Judgmentia in the distance, and they'd

probably be landing in a few units, if that. Shtirk had been to visit him a few times, trying to convince Flurn to speak against Zim at his trial. He'd promised to get Flurn's charges dropped if he turned against the Invader. Each time, Flurn refused to agree to it, and Shtirk left angry and fuming. And now, with Judgmentia looming, the trial would likely be held the next morning.

The former Tallest turned to face the door. He'd been given a larger room than Zim and Dib were sharing, and he hadn't seen anyone other than Shtirk and the drone that brought him meals in nearly a full three tenhafs. The isolation and his lowered status had resulted in his eyes and Pak slowly turning back to their natural pink, along with his body shape morphing back to a normal size. The Irken Tallest and Taller received regular injections of dye to help distinguish them from lower classes. An Irken who made a good living could afford the dye as well, if they wanted it, which was the reason for compressing the Tallest's waist. It stretched them out just a little more, and would never be seen on even a Taller.

The door suddenly slid open, and Flurn blinked in surprise at the sight of Gaz. She slipped into the room, closing the door behind herself, and quickly walked over to Flurn, grabbing the chain tied around his wrist. "What're you-"

"Shut up."

Flurn blinked again, watching as the chain fell away from one wrist, followed quickly by the other. "Gaz, what are you doing?"

The hyuman cocked an eyebrow irritably. "Getting you out. What does it look like?" The girl grabbed Flurn's wrist, pulling him back towards the door. "Come on. GIR's not going to stay quiet for long."

Gaz opened the door again, and Flurn saw GIR sitting on the floor across the hallway. The little robot smiled and waved, hopping to his feet. Gaz glanced down the hall both ways before nodding, and starting off towards the rear of the ship. "What do you mean you're getting me out, Gaz?" Flurn whispered, following the girl. "You don't honestly think we can possibly get off this ship, do you?"

"You don't honestly think I'm doing this without having spent almost three tenhafs planning, do you?" she snapped quietly, peeking around a corner before turning. "Come on."

"Gaz, there's drones all over. There are ships everywhere outside; we're not getting out of here!" the Irken hissed, stumbling as GIR jumped onto his back.

"Exactly. That's how we will get out, now trust me," Gaz growled back, stopping at a door. She opened it a crack and glanced in before continuing down the hall.

"Well, where are we going if you're so sure we'll get out? The hangers are towards the front of the ship, not the back!"

Gaz stopped, turning to give Flurn a look of absolute disbelief. "You have to ask?" she grumbled, shaking her head.

GIR squealed happily, kicking Flurn in the side. "We gonna get Mama!!"

~-~-~

Dib yawned, smirking at the Irken across the room. Zim hadn't said a single word since his leader had been arrested. It was almost creepy, but not so much that the human couldn't love finally seeing his enemy so broken. It took a lot of the edge off from the fact that Dib was pretty sure he was probably still going to be killed, even if Zim had turned out to be a criminal. The Irkens had a lot of pride from what Dib had seen, and he really doubted that they'd let him off.

Currently, Zim was sitting under the single window their room had. He'd looked out earlier that day, and seemed even more unhappy than before, if that were even possible. Dib had no idea what he'd seen out there, but it clearly wasn't something pleasant.

The door opened, drawing Dib's attention away from Zim, and he saw a rather short pink-eyed female in the doorway. She spared a single brief glance at Dib before walking over to Zim and beginning to untie his chain from the stake in the wall. "Tallest Shtirk wants to see you," she explained, pulling at the chain once it was fully untied. "Come." Zim forced himself to his feet, shuffling after her. The Irkens paused before leaving the room, and the female tossed a slight smirk in Dib's direction. "I do hope you enjoy your own trial, hyuman," she said, before the door clicked shut behind her and Zim.

Outside, Dib heard a faint shriek of what sounded like 'Mama', and something heavy slamming into the door. "That almost sounded like GIR," he murmured to himself, pressing his ear up against the door to listen better.

~-~-~

"Mamamamamama!!" GIR wailed happily, rubbing his face against the side of Zim's head. Zim cracked the first smile he'd shown in ages, allowing the robot to do as he wished. All too soon, the drone who'd brought him out of the room grabbed the SIR unit, handing him off to another Irken standing nearby.

"Zim, you have to keep your SIR quiet, or he'll ruin everything," she whispered, pulling at the chain still tied around his neck. "I'm risking a lot to help you right now, so don't screw this up, okay?"

Zim blinked in confusion, glancing past the drone to see Gaz and Flurn standing nearby. "What..?"

Flurn looked almost as confused as Zim, glancing from Gaz to the drone. "Oh, come on, Flurn," Gaz said with a smirk. "You didn't think there weren't any drones who prefer you over Shtirk, did you?"

The drone smiled as the chain fell away from Zim's neck, and she lowered it quietly to the floor. "You two are a real inspiration, My Tallest," she said, nudging Zim towards his lover. "I lost my Skeep a long time ago when it came out that he'd been with a Smaller, but he refused to give my name, and destroyed his own Pak to keep his memories from being seen." She smiled as Zim practically threw himself into Flurn's arms, rubbing his antenna frantically against the taller Irken's cheek. "I really hope things work out for you both."

Flurn smiled back at her, holding Zim tight against his chest. "Thank you," he murmured, his own antennae rubbing against Zim. "What's your name? I never was good with names."

"I'm Kip," the drone responded, "and we really should be keeping on the move if you four are going to get out of here."

GIR laughed madly, leaping from Flurn's shoulders to land on Zim's head. "We gonna get taquitos?!"

"No, GIR. No taquitos," Zim hissed, pulling the robot off his head. "Now GIR, you need to be very quiet. If you aren't, you'll get us all deactivated, understand?" The SIR cocked its head to the side, blinking slowly. "Of course you don't," Zim sighed, looking away for a moment. "All right. GIR. We're going to play a game, all right?"

"Eeeeeeeeeeeee!" GIR shrieked happily. "I like games! Is it a cheeeeeese game?!"

Zim slapped a hand over the robot's mouth. "No, GIR! It's a quiet game. You need to stay absolutely silent, understand? Don't make a sound, no matter what, or you lose. If you stay quiet until Zim tells you to speak, then we shall get your taquitos."

"Taquitos!!"

"GIR! Silence! Starting now! Understand?" Zim hissed, glancing around nervously. Some other drones had to have heard the SIR by now. GIR was still for a moment before nodding happily. Zim didn't really think he understood what was happening, but they'd have to hope he did, and get moving.

The little group started down the hallway towards the hanger, moving quickly and quietly, and occasionally coming across drones. Some supported them, and would give alerts on where other drones were stationed at, and Kip would snap a cable from her Pak into theirs, disabling them for a short amount of time so they'd have a credible story to give Shtirk for how they'd gotten past. She used the same technique on any drones that tried to stop them, but with a bit less care than the helpful ones. Several times GIR would break into a fit of shrieks or giggles, catching the attention of three groups of drones that supported Shtirk and two that helped them. After a fourth fight against Shtirk's drones, Gaz stopped them.

"Zim, you need to do something about GIR before we get caught," she growled, kicking the head of an unconscious drone. "These guys are going to start waking up soon, and we need to be out of here by the time that happens."

Kip frowned slightly. "She's right, Zim. We aren't even halfway to the hanger yet, and we've almost been caught several times. You have to make him be quiet, or leave him behind."

Zim stiffened, turning to the robot. "No one can make GIR be quiet," he murmured, antenna pressed against his skull. "He just doesn't know how."

"Mama!!" the robot screeched, jumping up and down. "Lookit what I can do!" He flipped onto his hands, doing a wobbly hand-stand for several seconds before falling noisily to the floor.

Flurn placed a hand on Zim's shoulder. "Zim, if you deactivate him, we can carry him to the ship and reactivate him later."

The ex-Invader started to nod, then shook his head. "Flurn, he's an old model. Zim looked him up once. If he's deactivated, it will be permanent." His antenna pressed harder against his head, and he glanced down a hallway. Footsteps were coming towards them, and Kip whipped the cable out of her Pak again. Zim closed his eyes for a moment, grabbing GIR by the antenna. He looked at the little robot for several long seconds, listening as the footsteps paused, turned, and went back the way they'd come from. "GIR...as far as sidekicks go, you've been horrible. You've ruined Zim's plans left and right, and never been any help," he whispered once the footsteps couldn't be heard, and pulled the SIR into a hug. "As a companion, however...Zim couldn't have asked for anyone better." In a single swift movement, he flipped open the robot's head, reached in, and pressed hard on a button at the top of his neck.

GIR smiled widely at the compliment, hugging Zim back. When the button was pressed, he stiffened, twitched, and went still, his bright cyan eyes dimming to a dark shade of gray. Zim straightened up, lifting the limp body into his arms, and starting down the hall again.

"Zim..," Flurn murmured, reaching out to touch the other's shoulder. Zim jerked out from under the touch, muttering that they had to keep going, and sped up.

As much as the entire party hated to admit it, with as fond as Zim and Flurn had grown of GIR and how much the girls could see it was hurting Zim to have lost him, they did move much faster without him. In about the same amount of time they'd already been going, they managed to reach the hanger, and only ran across two more solitary drones.

"This one," Gaz hissed, pointing at a Shuver close to the Massive's doors. "I disabled the tracking on it last night, so we want to take it. We just have to get out there into the traffic, and we can lose Shtirk easy." Flurn nodded, starting to duck into the ship.

"Well, well. What have we here."

Spinning away from the ship, Flurn saw Shtirk, Drek and a few other soldiers standing not ten units away.

"Drone Kip. And here I thought you were one of the smarter drones on this ship," the Tallest said with a sigh. "Drek."

Drek smirked, whipping a gun out of her Pak and firing straight at Kip's. The shot missed the center, but flew straight into one of the side panels, and Kip shrieked in pain.

"That hyuman boy told a drone that Zim had been taken to see me, and that he thought the defect was escaping. I really didn't want to believe you'd be so stoopid, Flurn. But...here we are," Shtirk said, arms outstretched to encompass the situation. "Now, are you going to fight me, or just come along quietly?"

Zim snarled at the Tallest, clutching GIR's body closer to himself. Shtirk caught sight of the broken robot, and laughed. "Lost your SIR, huh? I don't think that model reactivates, does it? Eh, not like it's that big of a loss, really. It never did you much good anyway. Now, come on, and I'll make sure the Control Brains deactivate you nice and quick, okay? I'll even throw the robot away for ya."

Kip and Zim caught each others' eyes briefly, and Zim reached into GIR's head again. "I may have lost GIR, but it will not have been in vain, Shtirk; and you will never have him," he hissed, flicking a switch situated between the robot's eye sockets. He threw GIR to Kip, who caught the now-beeping body and leaped at the other Irkens. Zim whipped his spider-legs out, grabbed hold of Gaz and Flurn, threw them into the back of the Shuver, jumped into the cockpit, and punched in commands to start the ship and open the hanger doors.

Kip used her own spider-legs to hold Shtirk and the soldiers in place, forcing them all through the unbroken panel as the beeping coming from GIR grew louder and faster. Shtirk furiously screamed orders at his soldiers, but Kip's legs were holding too firmly for any of them to even get up, let alone use their own weapons against her. Kip smiled a little, closing her eyes as she listened to the Shuver speeding out of the Massive. "I'm coming, Skeep," she murmured. "You've been waiting long enough."

GIR stopped beeping for a long second, followed by a powerful explosion rocketing from his chest. Red-hot metal rained across the soldiers, and Shtirk screeched in pain and fury.

Outside the Massive, the stolen Shuver fell into place in the line of ships leaving Judgmentia. A high-profile trial had been held over the past few days, and only just ended, so Gaz had decided to use that to their advantage, and Zim piloted them in to blend with the leaving spectators. After getting out of view of the massive, Gaz pulled him into the back, climbing up to take the wheel, and neither Irken argued. Flurn just wrapped his arms around Zim, pulling him tight against his chest, and Zim let out the hot, burny tears that had been hanging in his eyes ever since getting off the Massive.

~-~-~

Dib glanced up as the door to his room opened again, expecting to see Zim being dragged in. Instead, he saw Shtirk, covered in cuts, scratches, and a few burns. The Irken quickly hovered towards him, grabbing his exploding collar and punching in some quick commands. "Zim got away," he growled, wiping some blood from his arm onto the collar. "He took Flurn and Gaz with him."

"What'd he do to you?" Dib asked, feeling rather nervous as the collar gave two long beeps.

"Talked one of my best drones into betraying me, then threw his broken SIR at me after activating its self-destruct sequence. Kip managed to hold me and four soldiers until it exploded," the Irken explained bitterly, releasing a laser from his Pak and slicing through the chain in Dib's hand. "I need you to find them for me. In exchange, I'll pardon the humiliation you gave to the Irken empire. Zim is no longer even considered Irken at this point, so you really didn't do anything wrong in my view. But." He paused, grabbing Dib's chin and pulling him up to look him in the eye. "Don't get any funny ideas. I changed the settings on your collar, so you can go out without exploding, but I can activate it remotely, and I've set it to go off if anything happens to me. So don't think you can just go off and do whatever you want." He dropped the human to the floor, turning and floating out the door. "Come on."

Dib stumbled out after the Irken, blinking rapidly at the brighter light in the hallway. "Trust me, I'll do whatever I can to get Zim," he said, "but I need a pair of glasses or something. I can't see anything like this."

"I'll have the medical drones take care of your vision," Shtirk replied, leading the boy across the ship.

"I'm gonna need some kind of ship, too."

Shtirk grinned at that. "Don't worry about that, hyuman," he said. "Just make sure you kill Zim and Gaz, and bring me Flurn alive.

Dib was quiet for a few minutes at the thought of killing Gaz. She was his sister, after all. But...she'd always been so horrible to him. And she had been a leading factor in the destruction of Earth. Plus, she'd probably been the main reason Zim had gotten away. There was no way he could've done it without outside help. But she was still his sister. Dib shook his head. He had to stop that kind of thought. No sister of his would help destroy the Earth, and if Dib had to choose between killing her and being killed himself...well...it'd certainly be difficult to actually go through with, but he was pretty sure he could do it, as long as it was from a distance or something, and he did it quick.

The boy frowned at that thought. It made him feel a little sick to realize he probably could, and would have to, kill one of the last remaining humans in existence.

Shtirk led Dib through a large, open door into what looked like some sort of hanger. There were blurry, ship-like shapes everywhere, and they walked among them for a few minutes before stopping. Dib squinted at the small ship they had stopped at, grinning when he recognized the bored smiley face he'd painted on its hull in ninth grade. "Tak's old ship," he murmured, placing a hand against the door.

"I couldn't let Irken equipment be destroyed along with your planet, now, could I?" Shtirk asked with a smirk. "Now c'mon. I want your eyes taken care of so you can get out there as soon as possible," he said, turning to leave the hanger.

Dib followed happily. He was going to live, he'd be able to see again, and he was getting his own ship back. And all he had to do was kill his worst enemy. Not a bad deal.


	12. Arc 2: Chapter 1

"Number fifteen!" Gashloog yelled, dropping a greasy paper bag onto an already-full tray. A taller Irken marched up to the counter, wrapping her fingers around the edges of the tray and glaring at the drone. Gashloog felt his antennae press back nervously, and he shoved the food closer to the customer. The glare was a little unnerving, and he didn't think he'd done anything to deserve it. The food had come up pretty quick, and a glance over the tray didn't look like he'd forgotten anything. "Is there something wrong?" he asked, looking back at the other. Something about those eyes was weirdly familiar.

The Tall Irken smirked. "Oh, nothing," she said, lifting the tray. "I just felt I should say your restaurant is very boring. I'd very much like it if you were to, oh I dunno, dance in a suit full of hot grease for my amusement."

Gashloog blinked, watching the other walk back to her table. Her voice had been pretty deep for a female, and her antennae were really curly, like she'd done something to twist them more than they naturally grew. He jumped and was pulled back to the present as customers started screaming for their food.

~-~

Gaz snatched her bag off the tray as Zim sat down, cackling to himself about whatever abuse he'd given the cashier today. She pulled out a sandwich, and cast a critical glance at it to check for mistakes before biting into it. "So, Zek. What's got you in such a good mood?"

Zim smirked at the name, poking a straw into his milkshake and sucking down a large mouthful. "Demanding a former coworker dance in grease to entertain me," he replied, shoveling a handful of fries to follow the shake.

"He didn't realize you used to work here, did he?" Flurn asked quietly, nibbling at a Vort dog.

"Of course not, Flik!" the shorter Irken practically yelled through his fries. "I am Zi-...I am Zek! And Zek is far too amazing to allow such a thing!" A quick hand dove into Flurn's bag, coming out with a few Vort dogs, and they disappeared into his mouth.

Flurn laughed at the food-snatching, slapping at Zim's hand before snagging some of his fries.

It had been nearly a full two rounds since the three had escaped the Massive. One of the first things they'd done had been to stop by Vort, and stolen a prosthetic antenna, some spare clothes, and some clothing dye from a storage room. The dye had been used to darken Gaz's hair to a dark, almost blue shade of black. The Vortians had always used plant-based materials for pretty much anything they made, so they'd figured it would be safe enough to use on Gaz. She'd also cut her hair, restyling it to hang straight down in the back and not jut across her face. Her upper bangs had been left alone, though. Gaz had said they refused to lay flat unless wet, and neither Zim nor Flurn had really wanted to challenge her on it.

Flurn had needed to stay in the Shuver for nearly a hafround while his body eased out of the Tallest shape, leaving Gaz and Zim to get any supplies they'd needed. Zim had been recognized twice before they decided a better disguise than new clothes was needed, and he'd stayed on the ship with Flurn for two full tenhafs before he would agree to what Gaz kept suggesting. It wasn't until Flurn was able to leave the ship with him that the smaller Irken was willing to use a rather painful hot iron to curl the ends of his antennae, pull on a female's plain, purple tunic, and step outside the Shuver. The success of this disguise, combined with some curious glances at Flurn, quickly resulted in the taller male taking on a similar appearance, but with a pale pink tunic and shorter gloves.

The final touch to the group's disguises had been fake names. Flik, Gritch and Zek had been thought of early on, and despite attempts to think of better ones, they'd stuck quite well, and been used for well over a round and a haf.

Shortly after Zim and Flurn had started leaving the Shuver again, they'd also dumped the ship and picked up three Spittle Runners. They moved faster, were less noticeable, and Gaz had installed private radio links in them for safe communication. Separate ships had also helped with lessening the irritability all three would occasionally get, although Gaz was easily hit the worst, at constantly being around the others.

Looking different wasn't always enough, however, and to someone who was familiar with humans, and had even spent time in the very town Zim had stayed in, Gaz wasn't difficult to recognize. A small form in Shloogorgh's eyed the girl's table suspiciously while they mopped near the counter, and Zim's outburst quickly confirmed just who she was dining with. The watcher wasn't sure who the taller female was, but that wasn't important. What was important was that Zim was there. Eyes narrowing, the janitor turned to Gashloog, dropping their mop to the floor. "Tell Sizz-lorr I'm taking a break," they barked, turning back to the group's table. The now-empty seats pulled a growl from deep in their throat, and they quickly rushed out the door to find them.

~-~

"So, where to next?" Flurn asked, leaning against his Spittle.

Gaz opened a panel on the side of her ship, studying it for a moment. "I could use some fuel. What about you guys?"

The Irkens checked their Runners quick, and both nodded. "We shall need to find a fueling station, then," Zim said, scratching at the base of his fake antenna. "I saw one on our way in, it should be only a short fligh-"

"YOU!"

The three jumped at a sudden shriek. A female Irken was standing a short distance away, glaring furiously at Zim, hands clenched in tight fists.

Zim glanced at the other two curiously for a moment before turning back to the new arrival. He slowly lifted one hand, pointing at himself. "Me?"

"Yes, you!" the female hissed, stomping towards him. "You think you can hide yourself under curly antennae and female's clothing, but I see right through you, you filthy little bug!" she snarled, shoving at his chest.

"Zi-Zek does not know who you think she is, but-"

"Oh, just stop, Zim. I know it's you!" the Irken snapped, grabbing a fistful of Zim's tunic.

Zim slapped the girl away, taking several rapid steps back. "Who are you and how do you know Zim's name?!" he shrieked.

The Irken blinked, opened her mouth, closed it, and took a deep breath. "Please tell me you're joking." Zim stared silently, and the female turned to Gaz. "You remember me, don't you?" The human nodded, and the Irken turned back to Zim. "I can't believe you, Zim. First you ruin my life, then you never remember who I am when I manage to find you!" She narrowed her eyes, grabbing Zim's shirt again. "I'm Tak!" she screamed, shaking the ex-Invader. "Tak Tak Tak Tak Tak!!" Snarling, she slammed the taller Irken against his ship, scratching at his face.

Flurn grabbed Tak by the shoulders, pulling her away from Zim. "Okay, that's enough! Let's calm down, all right?" he said, lifting Tak from the ground and wrapping his arms around her chest, pinning her arms in place.

Tak's antennae pressed against her skull angrily, and she glared up at Flurn. "Let go of me," she growled, wriggling and kicking at the taller Irken. A well-aimed foot connected with the bottom of Flurn's gut, and he jerked in pain, losing his grip on Tak.

The violet-eyed Irken dove back on Zim, grabbing him by the antennae and biting down on the tips. Zim shrieked, bucking under her. He managed to slam his elbow into her throat, knocking her off his back. The female's grip on his antennae held strong, though, and took the prosthetic with her. Tak glanced at the fake for a moment before tossing it aside and jumping back onto Zim's shoulders. Zim snarled, swinging a fist at her before stumbling and falling to the ground.

"I'm done playing with you, Zim!" Tak screamed, smashing a fist against the back of his head. After only a few more hits, a boot slammed into the base of her neck, knocking her away from Zim. Gaz landed on top of her, punching and clawing. Tak fought back, kicking and scratching, but was quickly overpowered by the larger human. Gaz grabbed the Irken's wrists, and pressed her knees against the side panels of her Pak as she tried to release her spider-legs. The metal limbs did get out a bit, and Gaz grabbed them, wrapping them roughly around Tak's wrists and twisting them into a knot.

"Now," the human said, situating herself to sit just below Tak's bound arms, "if I let you up, are you going to calm down?" Tak merely hissed in response, writhing beneath the larger body. "Are you going to leave Zim alone?" The Irken gave a short laugh. "Thought not. If I let you go, are you going to tell anyone you've seen us?"

"Of course I will," the female growled. "I'll need to tell Sizz-lorr I'm taking time off to hunt you down so I can tear Zim limb from limb!"

Gaz nodded. "Okay then. Guess you'll be coming with us." She hopped off Tak's back, grabbing her by the wrists and dragging her towards her Spittle Runner. "C'mon, guys. I'll keep her with me so she can't get at Zim, but we can't have her running her mouth to whoever asks about us."

Zim pressed his prosthetic antenna back into place, frowning. "I remember you now, Tak! You stole my robot bee!"

Tak growled as Gaz shoved her into the back of the Runner. "I did not take your stupid bee!"

~*~*~

**I don't own Invader Zim. This is obvious. If I were Mr. Vasquez, I'd be too busy vomiting out of every orifice on my body from the sheer thought of Zim having a sexual relationship with any of the other characters to be typing this right now.**

**Okay. Arc two started. Finished this chapter just under a day before posting deadline. College is making me very tired this quarter for some reason. I sleep now.**


End file.
